[There's not a whole lot of weight to the drow, small and lightly armored as he is. If one can call that fluttery poet shirt he's got on right now 'armor'. So it's not at all difficult to heft him like that, and Jarlaxle isn't really putting his whole heart and soul into squirming free. Don't tell Astarion, that's mean!!!!]

It seems you have. I'd tell you not to look so smug, but even if it were all just luck, it was an impressive amount of it. I'll begrudgingly encourage you to enjoy the moment.

[The smugness is earned, he gets it! His hands snap up to rest upon Xenk's as the paladin bears down upon him, instinct more than anything else. The excitement in the drow's visible eye tells the truth of the matter; he's nowhere near concerned.]

You would leave it to the criminal to choose their punishment? You've a lot of faith that I'd sentence myself fairly.

[What manner of 'punishment' indeed though, now that was a question.]

Unless it still stings tomorrow, I'm likely to 'forget' whatever punishment I receive, so I'll encourage you to bear this in mind. But proper reformation doesn't really start with a heavy hand, does it? I'd then suggest perhaps the paladin see fit to fill me with holy inspiration, and maybe that might curb my penchant for ne'er-do-goodery.

[And then, after a moment-]

This is an innuendo, I'm giving you direct and enthusiastic consent to fuck me into the floor.

[He's being helpful!!!!]