escordvi | [open] waste time with a masterpiece, don't waste time with a masterpiece

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[open] waste time with a masterpiece, don't waste time with a masterpiece

Who: Zack Fair & You
Status: Open
Where: Where these threads happen.
What: A catch-all log for closed threads for February! Includes a few Manta Board prompts as well. If you would like something specific please let me know.
Warnings: Tba.

[🐺 a. the edge of sleep: closed to crewmates & planned cr]

[Ever wonder what it's like to drown? It's a story of opposites. There’s peace in the water. Like it’s holding you. Whispering low tones to let it in. And every problem in the world will fade away... But then there's this thing. In your head. And it's raging. Lighting every nerve with madness. You have to fight. To survive. And all the while the question is before you. Have you had enough?

Zack can't breathe. He can't concentrate. All he can feel is the water cradling him like a vice and the strange invisable fingers around his throat that are both there and not there. He's drowning... He has to fight to breathe and swim. He has to fight to wake up.

This time he does manage to wake up. It's with a painful jolt, his body screaming in pain as he winces awake. His lungs gasping and his muscles screaming. The black mark on his hand pulsates with dirty murkiness, threatening to slide up his arm.

There can be a few places to find Zack when he wakes up. Either in his cabin aboard his crew's ship or on deck where he's failed to keep himself awake and has fallen asleep in a chair or even leaning against the wooden railing. Or at the worst passed out in some random storage room on the ship.]

[🐺 b. part of their world]

[When he's not suffering sleep deprivation Zack does manage to get some work done. Life goes on and he’s well enough during the day to go about his daily life. That means that Zack is getting back to work. And that means taking pictures of...]

Mermaids? Great, the last time I dealt with mermaids they wanted to drag me under the water.

[He sighs. But he clicks through his shellphone for the camera function and then nods.]

Let's just hope the mermaids we find today are a little less touchy-feely.

[🐺 c. wildcard]

[got something else? feel free to put that down here or find me at

michrure for some extra plotting.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Don't speak quite yet.

[ Zack needs to catch his breath first. Raha wiggles behind the man, resting against a shoulder. Hands snaking around the other's waist so that he can press a hand against the other's sternum to rub small circles. ]

Breathe with me for a moment.

[ Try to match G'raha's deep breathing to try to soothe the burning of the lungs. The mark will be looked at later. For now he just wants to deal with one issue at at time. So manage the breathing first. ]

... Yeah.

[He's grateful for G'raha's warmth. The feel of a steady human body against his. He'll sit so that G'raha can be there behind him comfortably. And he lets out a slow breath once he feels G'raha's hand against his chest.

It's strange. The nightmare is about drowning. But each time it feels as though it's familiar. The dark depths of that suffocating liquid. It reminds him of something. Of being trapped in a glass vat of green chemicals...

Breathing. Just focus on the breathing.]

[ He continues to rub at Zack's chest. Presses a small kiss to the shoulder. Raha then allows for a curative spell to release from his fingertips - to help with the raw feeling that must be burning in his throat and lungs. Of course Raha is concerned for Zack. Worried sick, really.

It makes him yearn for the means to stop this. ]

Walk me through it, Zack. Slowly.

[G'raha's healing magic is soothing it helps Zack inhale a steadier breath of air into his lungs. Eases the burning and ache in the back of his throat.]

It started off the same way these dreams always do. Floating down into water, not a speck of light in sight.

[He shivers lightly almost like he can still feel the water around him. He slides one hand over G'raha's forearm to steady his thoughts.]

I can feel the air seeping out of me. Like a balloon losing air. It's ... It's frustrating. Because it feels so damn real.

[ There is a brief pause from G'raha. Then, slowly, there begins a rumble in his chest. He had heard that this, ahem, sound could be soothing. Calming and relaxing. Hopefully it would have the same sort of effect on the man he held onto as the other spoke.

He feels the shiver and there's a brushing of lips against skin once more. Whatever Zack needs to feel calm and in control. ]

Was there anything different this time? For a moment I feared you might not wake.

[... Is that G'raha- purring? The noise catches him off guard just slightly because this is probably only about the second time that he's heard the noise. But there is something comforting about it. It makes him feel less shaky. He tilts his head almost to ask G'raha if he is doing that for him but... Well. He'll tease him later.]

Yeah. There was something about the dream that reminded me of ...

[Hell.]

A time when I was completely out of control of my own body. I wasn't expecting it.

[ He is absolutely doing it for Zack's sake. G'raha doesn't really make it a habit to purr all of the time. Rare instances where he can't control instinct is usually the best time to catch him. But to do so willingly and on command? Oh no, this really is just for the man right there with him.

Zack trails off. The hand falls from Zack's chest. Drops to one of the man's hands and holds it. ]

Tell me of it.

[ Not that he is keen to make Zack relive that pain. However, sometimes talking about it gives one more control over it as well. ]

[He's not keen on reliving the pain either but the memory is heavy in his head now thanks to the nightmare. But G'raha's body so close to his is making it easier to think through it. He hasn't thought back to those days in a long, long time. Thought he had escaped it all. But it still sits with him, unknowingly.]

Near the tail end of ... [His Life??] my career as a SOLDIER there was an incident.

[He remembers the sharp pain in his head. The chemicals being injected into his body. Jenova cells. His bones and muscles screaming.]

There was this mad bastard named Hojo. A scientist. He got a hold of me [And Cloud] when I was down and out and the next thing I knew he had me floating. In a jar of who knows what.

[ Honestly, Raha just cares about this man so much. It almost frightens him how much Zack has grown to matter to him. And he's sure that Zack doesn't really want to talk about it, to discuss it. But right now is truly the best time. Raha knows a thing or two about sitting on things that hurt and how it can still linger within one's heart.

He listens, just giving Zack's hand a squeeze and continuing to rumble against him. Softly. Gently. ]

I know the sort you speak of. [ Amon. Various Garleans. Yes. Yes G'raha is familiar with the type of "mad scientist" that has no regard for life. ] I'm sorry, Zack. Really "sorry" isn't remotely close to express how I feel about it.

[The two of them have shared a lot of stories about their lives by now. But Zack hasn't explained this part of his life. It's dark. And hazy even for him now. And he's not sure he wants to bring up the old trauma of it all not after he's finally managed to escape it. In the grand scheme of things, G'raha has led a life so intense and full of self-sacrifice that he knows he'll understand. And still, Zack hesitates.

But he manages to explain further. He explains to G'raha how he was kept in that vat of chemicals for ... years. He explains to G'raha how it was just him and Cloud, trapped, drowning and unable to gain enough consciousness to move or fight. He explains how he still doesn't know exactly what Hojo did to their bodies but it had something to do with Jenova cells and how Zack was strong enough to handle it where Cloud wasn't. Eventually, Zack managed to gain enough strength back to break the glass and get him and Cloud out of there but... The memories of floating are still heavy.]

Guess that's what makes these nightmares that much worse for me.

[ They have shared many stories - primarily light hearted ones. Shared information pertaining to their own stars and things that are unique to both. Raha won't say that he completely understands the terminology that Zack uses from time to time or how it would be different back home. However, the Miqo'te does understand that this is hard for Zack to talk about. It isn't something he wants to talk about and yet the man is sharing all the same.

During the conversation, Raha is coaxing Zack to lay back down. Arms continue to hold Zack. Press the man up against Raha's own chest so that he can be close to the purring. So Raha can continue to stroke dark strands of hair and nuzzle into the top of that head. ]

You called me selfless at the spring. Yet you fail to fully give yourself credit for the strength of heart that you carry. Zack, you are incredible to still be able to smile and not allow it to burden you more than this.

[ He cups a cheek to have Zack look at him. His heart aches for this man. They are alike in so many ways, in what burdens their hearts and yet try to shake off as nothing. ]

Thank you for speaking to me about all of this. It can't be easy to allow yourself this, but I am here and I am not going anywhere. We'll defeat this curse, Zack. You've already overcome so much.

[He's pretty sure no one has ever, essentially, Big Spooned him like this before. It's kind of amusing in a way although he just lets that light laugh fade off his lips once they settle down. What's even better than the purring noise is the gentle sound of G'raha's heartbeat too.]

I hope so. Sometimes I think my optimism is the best weapon I have.

[To deal with things too.

He shifts to turn his head to G'raha. And when he sees that bleeding heart expression on G'raha's face and the look in his pretty red eyes Zack can't help sighing a little. He cares about this man so much as well. More than he thought he could this fast. And thinking about either one of them dying because of this shit curse is just... unacceptable.]

I know we'll get through this somehow, and I mean together. Don't go thinking I won't be trying to find a solution for you too. Have your dreams been bad?

[ Just because he is small doesn't mean that he can't be a big spoon Zack! Goodness! But even so, Raha's thumb is stroking that man's cheek. Right under one of those yes. Along the cheekbone. Back and forth. Despite the things that Zack has told him, there is still a light there. This isn't someone who has succumbed to those circumstances and the darkness they bring.

And that, to G'raha, is one of the most admirable traits that one could have. ]

Aye, together. Any solution found will benefit us both.

[ He quiets for a moment, when talking about his own dreams. None of his tie in so closely to the sensation of drowning. Not like Zack's do. ]

I... I dream not of my own experiences in these moments. Rather, the Isle of Val. As I've mentioned, I belong to an order called the Students of Baldesion and I might have mentioned the island before. What I did not tell you was that the island was plunged into the Lifestream. Nearly all of the Students that day were lost and I had thought Krile amongst them at the time.

[ Thus does he dream of all of those lives - people that he had grown up with and adored - lost. ]

[Zack appreciates the touch, though! The cuddling and the gentle brush of fingertips on his face. He could turn around and kiss and scoop G'raha to him right now if he could. But he also enjoys being the little spoon right now! Amazing! It makes the breath return to his lungs, easy as that. For now.

It's a sombre little moment, though. Listening to G'raha recount such a scary time in his life. Almost losing friends... Actually losing friends. These nightmares are cruel.]

Damn... I'm sorry, Raha. Something like that, I can't imagine how long that would sit with a person. [He slides a hand to G'raha's leg, gives it an affectionate squeeze.] Your friend, Krile? She's okay?

[ Well Raha wouldn't tell Zack no if he would think to twist and turn in the embrace. It would mean that he could gaze upon the other more readily. Fully. And there is something powerful about that. Something that sends shivers up and down his spine at the sight of those enchanting eyes.

He sighs when Zack speaks, hugging him a little tighter. ]

I am not the one who suffered the experience thus I'm fairly sure 'tis I that should be spending time reassuring you. Not the other way around.

[ He feels the squeeze. Smiles sadly, grateful Zack can't see it. His tail wraps around Zack's arm. ]

Krile is well, though I didn't know it until after I had woken up two hundred years later.

Edited 2024-02-13 04:02 (UTC)

[Zack frowns for a moment. G'raha really is the type to try and brush off his trauma because he's too busy comforting someone else, huh? It's just like him.]

Finding out two hundred years later? I'd still say you went through something traumatic from that alone.

[He went four years not knowing if his friends were dead or alive- he can barely imagine two hundred. But they're not here to compare they're here to support.]

Come here.

[He'll turn around in G'raha's embrace then. Scooping his arms around G'raha's torso. Tugging him in so they're touching and close once more. And he hugs him tightly and firmly.]

I was in stasis for nearly all of that time, Zack. Honestly, I wasn't even aware of the passage of time.

[ That's why it's not really comparable. Zack seems to have been able to come in and out of awareness. G'raha... It had been like going to sleep and then just waking up.

But he's not given a chance to argue. Instead Zack turns. Sweeps Raha up in an embrace and seeks to hold him. It's a tight thing. One that makes Raha's chest want to burst in warmth and a blend of emotions. Many, many emotions.

He can't help himself. Raha bumps his forehead against what he can get to of Zack. A feline instinct that he just can control at the moment. And he embraces the other just as tightly. ]

Edited 2024-02-15 20:05 (UTC)

[G'raha will forehead bump the top of Zack's head because he's still lower on the bed enough to be the little spoon right now. Even if Zack's arms are all-encompassing G'raha is a big tight hug.]

Still. I'm sorry, anyway.

[He lets out an easier sigh. His breathing seems to be evening out now. The remnants of the nightmare slowly ebbing away. He inhales slowly, enjoying G'raha's body close to his. Letting that feeling ache through him.]

This makes it better. Makes the nightmares feel farther away. Thanks for being here.

[ His tail is going to shift again. This time it is going to wrap about Zack's waist. Or at least drape there, the tip of it twitching. Raha hums into Zack's hair, accepting the sentiments without pushing them away further. Instead he closes his eyes and nuzzles into it more. Feels Zack's breath. Listens for the heartbeat that continues to slow down to normal. ]

You may have this whenever you need and even time when you do not.

[ In other words, Zack is allowed to have this from Raha. It's something he can have. Can request. ]

We are together in this as well as other things. Thanks is not needed.

[This is bliss. Using G'raha like a pillow and hugging him like one too. He can entirely forget that nightmare now. He has... cat boyfriend.]

How did I get so damn lucky...

[A sentiment he's been wondering for a while now. Actually.]

[ G'raha chuckles and holds Zack tighter. ]

Are we about to get into another argument over those sorts of statements? I feel as though to say that quite often. It is debatable, of course, who is more fortunate here.

[He chuckles in return. Even turns his face to G'raha's skin and blows a very mature raspberry on it.]

Agree to ... agree then. [Yeah.] We both are.

[ WOW YES SO MATURE OF YOU!? G'raha yelps and laughs, tail smacking against Zack.

This is not what you do in order to sleep, sir! ]

To think it all it took was sitting at the wrong table one random evening.

[Listen, this is therapy. Zack grins against G'raha's skin and then kisses the spot just below his collarbone.]

Well, that and you wearing a pretty dress.

[Don't forget that's when Zack completely wanted to ask him out on a date.]

[ He hums, amused and touched by the kiss. G'raha scratches at the back of Zack's head. Right were the neck starts - the hairline. ]

Is this a poor time to tell you that I still have that dress? 'Tis kept with my things in my room.

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