escordvi | [Open] It's A Bad Dream

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[Open] It's A Bad Dream

Who: Toge Inumaki and everyone!
Status: Open
Where: Early May on the Plus Ultra crew ship, later on Manta board quests on islands.
What: Catch all for May/Return from canon update
Warnings: Toge has just returned from a massively traumatic incident, and he's returned with his left arm amputated. He was dealing with a mass casualty event, and the destruction of Shibuya in pretty much its entirety, with a death toll in the tens of thousands. He's seriously injured and tired. He's doing his best.

I. The Return

[ It’s a surreal experience being returned home, mostly because Toge didn’t remember what he was doing, where he was but he’d had a few dreams or strange impressions. Dreams of a pair of beautiful mismatched eyes, or the scent of saltwater on the wind, both unusual occurrences that he might’ve dwelled on but everything went to shit pretty quickly. His return home was not the least bit peaceful or relaxing because shortly after October began, pieces fell into place and the threat that was lurking in the shadows bared its fangs.

The mood overall was grim, the anticipation that something big was coming paid off, and they were caught off-guard and left behind in the wreckage of what could only be termed an unmitigated disaster. The sorcerers fought and lost – hard. There’s no victory that could be gleaned from the Shibuya Incident.

His first arrival in this land had been careless, he’d been dropped overboard to sink or be rescued. Thankfully the latter had happened. This time, no matter what kindness was shown in moving him back, it wasn’t going to matter. It was still going to hurt.

Toge reappears on the deck, not tangled up in any rigging, but landing hard against a storage crate as he collapses into a seated position. There’s a lot to take in about his bedraggled look. His skin was pallid, his eyes bloodshot and there’s bags thanks to him having been awake for well over twenty-four hours at the moment. He might’ve passed out a minute or two, but not much longer. His shirt is long gone, his pants look suspiciously two-toned, although the dark material mostly covers the root cause of that, but it wouldn’t be hard to guess. Bandages have been slapped around his chest, left shoulder and what remains of his left arm which has been amputated fairly high up. It’s not a final fix, as the bandages are hiding injuries that are still seeping. It had been a slap dash band-aid fix, with more to come later when Shoko had a moment to breathe.

He’s only human. The harsh landing sends his vision swimming and he curls in around himself, letting out a strangled cry of anguish, followed by deep heavy breathing. He might have a high pain tolerance, but this is definitely testing his limits. Anyone hearing his cry might get a sense that he is in distress, even before they see him.

A normal person might just take a moment and adjust, but Toge isn’t exactly sure where he is off the top of his head. He trembles. Mixed with his pallor and the severe looking injuries, it’s likely caused by the fact a significant amount of his blood has been dropped in Shibuya.

He drags his legs. They’re heavy and uncooperative. He puts his hands down on the deck. Okay, that’s a strange feeling because he now only has one, but it’s going to have to do.

Yes, Toge is about to drag himself to his feet and get up, no matter how unsteady he looks right now, undoubtedly accomplishing this he would look a thousand times worse. ]

II. Rest, Recovery & Recreation

[ Presumably once his arrival is sorted out and he’s been escorted back to his room under his own free will, or not, he’s certainly going to have to stay there, in bed or perhaps on the couch for a few days.

Toge could use some company to help pass the time. Really. It’s going to be really boring, but he looks a little bit peaky in general and Thornprick is hesitant to leave his side.

(So is Shoto for that matter.) ]

III. One Step Forward

[ Once he’s steady on his feet and can move around the ship, Toge can be found heading to the galley to rustle up something to eat, or perhaps just leaning against the rail, looking out at the sea.

Noticing company from his crew mates, he raises his right hand in greeting and offers a very tired, drained smile. ] Kelp!

[ His level of fine may in fact be dubious in nature. ]

IV. Landlubbin’ Manta Board Quests

[ It’s a chance to get to meet up with his friends who aren’t traveling with him. Seeing people he recognizes, or even if he doesn’t, they might get a cheerful smile behind his mask and a friendly wave. ] Kelp!

[ Wait, didn’t Toge have two arms the last time he’d been seen? He sure did. Now his left sleeve is empty, but he’s not necessarily drawing attention to that. He seems as cheerful as ever.

That smile does not really reach his eyes.

Whether it’s just catching him out in the middle of the street, at a tavern or on one of the many missions – such as helping harvest brussells sprouts with a decent amount of difficulty, being escorted so he can dress up as an adorable maid to lure people into cracking open their coin purses or investigating Snaxburg Secrets, Toge seems like he’s ready to just keep going. ]

V. Wildcard

[ So Toge has returned from a canon update and he’s returned severely injured, with an amputated left arm. So that happened. All in all he looks tired, but he would love to just hang out with people. ]

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To be caught in strong arms is not what Toge's expecting. He's not the most alert, considering how much blood he's lost, how exhausted he is, so things aren't exactly connecting like they would. There's no resistance for Shoto to pick him up.

He's pale, he's trembling and his wounds aren't quite closed, but he's just seeping a bit. Nothing too serious. Shoko took care of the worst of it. He vaguely remembers that. Maybe?

Toge's not quite sure how long it's been, time has lost all meaning at this point. Those eyes, the one's he'd dreamed of make him smile a little bit, as though he's oblivious to Shoto's panic. He kind of is. He feels like he's floating.

"Tuna mayo." He whispers. It's good to see Shoto, isn't it? He sounds tired and weak, despite his face being bare there's not much left in his cursed energy reserves. He's tapped out.

There's no effort to carrying him, even normally, and less now. Shoto glances down, putting his hand over the first thing he can see still blooming out something remotely red. He hasn't gotten exactly perfect at this, but he's certain he can stop a small seep. It's the movement and then the smile that makes his heart drop and his chest reveal the tremble in his own breath. He wants to be happy, but he can't be just yet, but he can't let himself be sad, either, not in front of Toge. He offers a tiny, shaky smile back at him.

"...Hello to you, too." His voice cracks and his other hand settles at the side of Toge's face. Now isn't the time to blurt out 'what happened to your arm'. Now is the time to set his forehead against Toge's and keep trying to apply more metaphorical bandaids over the other metaphorical bandaids. "Here, come closer." He's not actually making Toge move, he feels cold and so Shoto adjusts his quirk and even if he's kneeling at the moment at the side of the cabin bed, he's as close as he can be.

It's fortunate he's not that big, or that heavy. Muscular and dense, certainly, but there are many people who would outclass him when it comes to weight class in the sorcerer world. He doesn't have to move because Shoto's coming in closer.

Shoto's ability can help. It's not RCT, it's not perfect, but it can ease some of his discomfort and that's enough for now. He's glad Shoto is so close, but he doesn't really have the strength to do much about that. He raises his hand, unsteady and reaches for Shoto's shoulder, just to touch him lightly.

Getting him settled makes it easier to see what they've done to him, both in respects to bandaging him up, and some of the closed, deep wounds peeking out from under the bandages. Lighter scratches on the side of his torso towards his pants. The blood that had seeped into his clothes isn't really damp anymore, so it's been a little bit of time since he was lying in a pool of his own blood. "Kelp."

His eyes aren't straying from Toge's for the moment, he's not interested in seeing any of the damage he knows is under his hand. Not yet. The tiny refrain of 'Kelp' makes his breath shaky again and his smile waiver a little more. Something happened to him when he went home. Something terrible. Something worse than terrible to have ripped and tore the body of this teen he loves so much.

Loves so much.

"I'm sorry, Toge, that I didn't tell you before you left how much I love you." That was so easy to say. He doesn't know why he hadn't said it before or why it seemed so frightening or hard to get out. "I won't make that mistake again."

Toge might've glossed over the biggest horrors of his world and so he hadn't adequately prepared Shoto for this being a possible outcome. He's not thinking clearly, not really, even if the pain is keeping him conscious, he should be more concerned. Shoto's expression tells him he's safe.

He's not sure why he thinks that, but he does.

"Takana." He whispers. It's okay. He knew, but he didn't know. Shoto didn't say it, but it matches how he feels about him. Toge smiles because he's happy to hear it, but at the same time he doesn't have words to express it.

Shoto himself is moments away from crumbling and knowing that he has to stay strong to make sure he doesn't scare Toge more than he must be-- Or maybe he's in shock? Shoto thinks it may be that. There's nothing that could've prepared him for Toge coming back to him divested of his arm and barring scars. Worse that he can't even, at that moment, ask Toge who did this to him.

Swallowing a thick bit of emotion back, hearing that one single word puts him at ease in ways he didn't ever think he could feel. While he's not ready to let himself break down, there is a single tear running down his cheek as he sets his head against the pillow next to Toge's. Just for a few moments. Just a few. He can tell him every day from now until they break each other's hearts by being stolen away back home again. He knows it's coming, and time is ticking yet again, but every precious second is in fact just that, too precious not to have.

Sitting up, Shoto looks at the bandages, they'll have to be changed. So will Toge in general, but right now making sure that he's alright is Shoto's concern. ...His arm. "Are you in pain anywhere?" He has to know just how deep the shock or blood loss might be. His eyes can't help but remain focused on the lack of arm, "I may have to take all these off... Some of these need ch-changing. All if them... I think." He has the knowhow to deal with things like this but...

While Shoto takes a moment to compose himself, he reaches up and pats him on the back of the head. Toge is strangely unemotional about the whole thing. There's definitely some shock there, perhaps that's it, or perhaps it's the fact he's known since he was old enough to remember that this was a potential outcome of his job. The only job he could do.

He's not wrong. Toge has the same skills, but he can't look after his own bandages. The writing is seals, and he's not sure if it's been long enough. It probably has? He doesn't feel like he's still under attack. They might've been a precaution to begin with.

"Salmon. Mentaiko." It hurts, yes, but he's got this. Shoto doesn't have to worry about his pain levels. He's endured...well not worse. Actually, this is probably the most painful thing that's ever happened to him. They didn't do anything for the pain. They'll get to him eventually, that was the thinking. It's not Shoko's fault. She was running herself ragged. What a clusterfuck it had been.

The mention however, has him looking down at himself. Right. That. The big that. He nods a little bit in agreement. Yes, he probably needs his bandages changed. That makes sense.

That Toge is trying to comfort him, knowing full well that he is in a worse state than Shoto. It breaks his heart. It breaks his heart in a good way and oxymoron or not it just-- He gets ahold of himself again.

Judging by the look of things, the hero can tell they're something... something that looks like symbols that may be religious or not. This he's not certain of. This is the realm that Toge takes over and Shoto's belief is only what he's told. Salmon is an easy one, pairing it with Mentaiko makes it a little more difficult, but he's certain he understands. At least enough that he has to do what he has to do anyway.

But if he could only take his eyes away. "Midoriya is here, I'm sure he's finding help. Until then... I'm here. I'm not leaving you for one second." Shoto pulls his eyes away, starting with the bandages on Toge's chest. His healing isn't anywhere near what it needs to be to help with much other than not letting him bleed slowly like a thousand cut death. The sight underneath it makes his blood boil. After the horror of finding Toge like this, and realizing he's not dying, just holding steadily above it, Shoto is allowing himself every other emotion, too. "If it gets too much, please stop me. We can take things slow."

He's already grabbing something that looks metal to throw ice in it, boil it and begin to sterilize it for the bandages he keeps on his hero costume within the cannisters. The devastation to his boyfriend's body is obvious. He has to be lucky to be alive, to continue to be alive.

Edited 2024-05-02 07:41 (UTC)

It isn't anything Shoto needs to be concerned about, Toge doesn't think, so he doesn't stop him.

Getting the bandages off makes it look a lot more real. There is not one cut, but many, including some that are deeper than others, some are light, leaving a criss cross mash up of scarring. It's probably horrific enough, Toge thinks. It was like he'd been tossed in a blender, if there was such a big enough one to fit him. His arm definitely took the brunt of it.

He's lucky. Toge is the lucky one that survived the onslaught. Almost no one else did. He doesn't complain, but it's equally obvious it probably hurts, his back is probably affected too, which it is, but he made it out.

He won't have a reason to stop Shoto. No matter how much it hurts, he won't make a sound.

Shoto finishes taking the bandages off, setting them aside and is taking in the entirety of the damage to him. If he sees a spot bleeding, he does his best to heal it. All the same he moves carefully to clean the area, washing with the most careful of movement of gauze around the wounds. When it comes to his back, it's a little harder, but he gets it done, gets it clean. He needs a more decent shower than this but... what he thinks Toge needs is rest as soon as Shoto can get this done.

His eyes focus again on the teen's arm. The red that Shoto is seeing isn't the dried blood. It's anger that he can't resolve. Yes. This could happen to anyone in his life, too, yes this has happened to people in the past but it's never crossed his mind that Toge would be attacked like this. He uses what he has left of his medical supplies to continue bandage him up. "I'm sorry, Toge." because it must be painful. Or maybe he's sorry he couldn't be there to protect him. Or both. Another tear falls from his right eye and he wipes it away as fast as it comes. "Rest..." he's sure that someone is finding help right now, Midoriya likely. "We're going to get you help. I'll stay right here. So rest... No one, and nothing will hurt you anymore."

He finds it a little awkward to be doted upon like this. He's faced injury before, but most of it was minor compared to this. He doesn't really like feeling so helpless, but here he is. Stuck like this. Stuck in this situation.

He sighs and lets Shoto look him over. Toge doesn't look like he's afraid - he isn't. Shoto will protect him. That much, he firmly believes.

"Tuna mayo." He knows. He knows he's safe there. He can't rest though, at least he doesn't think so. He's still too uncomfortable.

It can't be ideal to have to be taken care of. Shoto has hated it every time he was in the hospital. So... Shoto tries to think back as far as he can, to a time that was much more pleasant. What would his mother have done to comfort him when he was younger and couldn't sleep for pain and discomfort. Shoto's hand wipes itself off on his uniform, then rests fingers into Toge's hair. He's imagining the arm hurts. All of this looks really fresh. He can't heal it. He can't re-grow it, but he can try to at least set his hand on the remaining part of it, just above the rounded end and set to heal what he can. It might not be anything, it might even be placebo more for him than Toge. But he will continue to brush his fingers through his hair.

Trying to think of anything to help, maybe some soothing warm at the same time might be helpful. "Thornprick has been staying with me." he offers, maybe he can talk calmly enough to help him maybe not sleep, but rest. "You've been gone a while, he'll be happy to have you back. When we get you home, you'll see."

A very gentle hand, and caress through his hair helps almost as much as the healing does. It hurts, but Shoto's doing what he can to clean him up. It will help him heal in the long term more than it will fix anything. He's already realized it can't be fixed. Shoko told him. She tried. There's nothing Toge can do about it.

Yet, Shoto's actions make him smile all the same, with a soft warmth that he doesn't deserve right now. He feels better in his presence.

"Salmon." He murmurs agreeably. Thornprick missing him is cute. He imagines a cat would miss its owner, wouldn't it? He was glad Shoto took care of him.

"Tuna mayo." A thank you, for all of it.

That he can smile at all in the face of this, makes Shoto feel better and worse all the same. How much pain must he be in? Was he in? If he does or doesn't deserve them, Shoto's efforts are always going to be at the maximum attempt. Though, deserved or not, Shoto offers back a tiny smile, nodding his head.

"It's alright. You'd do the same for me." And might one day have to. His fingers softly card through the light strands of hair, stopping mid crown of his head to come back and start the venture all over. "I missed you, too." He clarifies. And if this is the state of his world, then: "I'm glad you're back. I don't know how to travel inter-world."

Edited 2024-05-02 08:51 (UTC)

He would, he would do the same for Shoto in a heartbeat without question. He would give up his life for him, even if the other man didn't want that. The only indication that Toge was still in pain was that he was even letting Shoto do this without moving around, or attempting to get up.

"Fish flakes. Tuna mayo." He doesn't know how to travel to another world either. Toge's tone suggests he's quipping that he's not that smart. He isn't. He'd never figure out inter-world travel.

That would be the last thing Shoto would ever want. It's impossible to think of the world where Toge didn't have the chance to come back at all, to even be alive. A world Shoto wouldn't want to be in. Inter-travel world or not. Even in the face of all this, Toge is making jokes and the punchline may be mired in guessing games for Shoto but... It's pretty obviously in that tone of voice that he's trying to play around through the lot of what's going on. That's something Shoto will forever admire, too.

"I don't know what happens when we go home... but I know that when I'm done what needs to be done there, I'll find a way back to you." He got here, didn't he? They both did. There has to be a way. "...But for now, while we're here, until you're feeling better, stay with us at my place. I'm sure you'll be back to better in a short time but until then." Toge can say no if he wants, but Shoto hopes he doesn't. "You're as much a part of all of us, and everyone missed you."

Shoto is such a romantic, really, that it warms Toge's heart. He never considered anyone would feel that way about him, not when he's the clan reject, the outcast in his own society. It doesn't matter though, he knows what he's feeling with him is very real and while he seems to be tolerating his poor humour well, Toge knows they're just avoiding.

He holds up three fingers. Give him a few days to recover enough to travel comfortably and he'll go with him. "Fish flakes." He murmurs, because it's a gentle rejection. He can spend a couple of days building up to it. He'd like to get there on his own two feet and not be too dizzy to move.

Clan reject, social outcast-- All their loss. None of them deserve him in their life if that's how they think about him. Their situations and stations and childhoods were all different and shared similarities, but it's true. All of it. Their loss.

The fingers are glanced at and then back to Toge's face. Shoto has to sacrifice petting his hair to begin the icing process of the heat and ice method of wound care. That's a no, annnnnnd... a three. Sorry, Toge, he's not perfect at this yet. It disappoints him that he has to riddle it out. "We can stay here, then. If this is where you want to be for now." Yes we. When he said he's not leaving his side, he meant it. "Toge..." He's sorry, and he knows details aren't coming any time soon. "...Was this an accident?"

Toge doesn't offer another protest, so he's fine with Shoto being there. If he wasn't, he would say so. While he's imperfect, that's to be expected. He wants to move under his own power, so a few days it will have to be at least until he can get his blood flowing properly.

He doesn't have his shellphone handy. Oh, it's somewhere, but he can't remember where he put it. Shoto can either do some digging, or he can offer his up. Toge mimes typing with his thumb over his hand. He can answer questions.

That one, however, doesn't need a full answer. His eyes down cast a little bit. He's thinking about it, just how much of it is his fault. He should've realized the signs, but he thought he was far enough away from Sukuna. Based on the explosions that had caught his attention it had been at least a kilometer. That much he was sure. Had he moved closer?

Toge doesn't know. "...Fish flakes..." He wouldn't call it an accident exactly. "Tuna."

He did not get out of the way. That much is on him.

Shoto isn't sure which he wants the answer to be. Yes or no. Yes means that at least... At least he's wrong and his mismatched eyes are deceiving him. But the tactician in him says this wasn't an accident and yet... All he has to see is that little look downward in thought. Then someone had done this to Toge. Or something. A curse maybe.

He's certainly looking, even without the small incentive to. Shoto has caught the movement of typing but he isn't sure he wants Toge to have to re-live it. It's his own that he pulls out, not willing to even step away for a second, not a split second. "Here." He offers, switching up the temperature acclamation to his other hand again, which means he can continue the soft petting through his hair.

A world away and Shoto already doesn't know if he'd bother with jail for whoever did this. Maybe this is how some people feel about a certain someone in Shoto's life, too.

Toge has enough tech knowledge to activate the text-to-speech even on Shoto's shellphone. His was preloaded, but that didn't mean he didn't know hot to toggle it on and off. Most of the time it's on, but with Shoto he tends to keep the AI voice quiet. In this case, he will let it speak for him so Shoto doesn't have to stop doing what he's doing. Trying to make him feel better.

I would call it a work injury. It's not that bad. We walked into a nightmare.

The voice repeating these lines is far too cheerful for this conversation.

Not minding what Toge does to his phone, he continues to use his hands to try to bring some alleviation. Be it through healing fruitlessly or not, or the first aid he knows. However, his movements stop momentarily when he hears the first line.

A WORK INJURY?

Shoto's inner voice had never been so loud in his head, but he was quiet and as contemplative as always on the outside. It wasn't Toge he was angry at, after all. He didn't even know who he was supposed to be mad at. "...You're saying a nightmare in comparison to?" He pauses, trying to clarify. "It's that I'm sure you've seen a lot of nightmareish things before..." His eyes befall the man's arm again. "Before you were sent back. My only other guess is that someone or a something, a curse, did this to you."

If they ever show their face here, Shoto has two limbs and a right mind to-- To what? If Toge couldn't beat them, then he doesn't want to think about it right now. Because he'd still clock whoever it was to blast them off at the speed of light.

Toge had seen many nightmarish things, it was part of the job. This is just another part of it. The sorcerers were seen as expendable, manpower to be used and driven to the brink before they even reached adulthood. A good deal of sorcerers didn't make it to age 30. It's just reality.

Now he's not sure he's going to make it to 18, nevermind 30. What a mess. What a horrible mess.

It was the worst thing any of us had ever seen. Thousands upon thousands of people died. It was a curse, but it's not Yuji's fault.
I don't know why it happened. I shouldn't have been close enough to get hit. I'm sure he was far away from me but doesn't matter. I was. I shouldn't have been there. Everyone I was protecting, gone in the blink of an eye.

Thousands of people... That's not a war. Or if it is that's-- It's unfathomable.

The name Yuji is familiar only in the way that Shoto had heard him mention it. But pointedly saying it wasn't someone's fault means that there's a perception that it might have been. So it's someone named Yuji from the same school as him who is a curse. Even if he doesn't know that he doesn't have the information right, it's already in his head. Hit by what? But, before he can make mention of what's floating in his head, he hears the rest of the message and his eyes lock again with Toge's.

Everyone? Shoto looks back down at the typed message in the history of the conversation. He's reading it, and re-reading it. If Shoto feels powerless, he can't imagine what Toge feels like. Not on that scale, not at all on that scale. There is nothing like trying to save someone and having them ripped from your hands. His was watching Bakugo be taken, but this? "...I can't imagine what you went through, Toge." He offers the only bit he can, leaning down to kiss his forehead. "I've seen destruction, but not like that. If this Yuji isn't at fault... Then who did this to you?"

He doesn't know what happened to cause Sukuna to go loose. He wasn't there, and Yuji was fine last he saw him. What he does know, is that Yuji would never do that, what he did.

Yuji is a host for a special grade curse. A really strong one. They've been sharing the same body, and while he's caused trouble before, he's never been let loose like this. I don't know what happened. I know it wasn't Yuji. He wouldn't have cratered Shibuya. I was more than a kilometer away from him, I'm sure of it.

He opened his domain expansion and the buildings around me, the people I had herded and was keeping calm disappeared into nothing and I ended up like this. I won't let Yuji take the blame.

He's not sure it's going to matter. Everything is a mess and the Elders will follow through with the execution. That much he's already reasoned.

I'll try. I don't have any pull. I don't want them to execute him.

[Open] It's A Bad Dream

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