escordvi | [ closed ] Life is a series of journeys, my friend

[Don't worry, he'll more than likely let G'raha move to sit next to him in a civilized manner.]

You had the chance to "meet" twelve gods, did you? Once again, nothing beats the crazy adventures you get up to.

[G'raha is truly something else. To be able to see something that cosmic and celestial...]

Tural?

[ Good. Means that G'raha can hold Zack's hand. Thread fingers together with a soft, fond smile. ]

I wouldn't call that crazy. It felt more like a farewell than anything else.

[ His head rests on Zack's shoulder. He explains, geographically, where Tural is located. What he had known of the "new world" prior to his journey there. G'raha speaks of Wuk Lamat and the monster hunting... And Krile's words. ]

To not be left behind, I understand the feeling. I genuinely understood where she was coming from, learning a brand new skillset just to be... Useful.

[He holds that hand back. Cute.]

... You stayed behind so she could go, didn't you.

[He thinks he's got that right on the nose. G'raha is a bleeding heart.]

That probably killed you. But you're a good friend.

[He rests his head on top of G'raha's head.]

[ He turns to look at Zack with his ears perked. Eyes slightly wide. ]

How did you know...

[ Raha's face turns red as he settles, feeling Zack's cheek on his person. ]

I wanted to go with them so bad. However, it was important for her to be there. Not necessarily mean.

Lucky guess.

[It's pretty telling the kind of person the G'raha is. As soon as he started talking about them leaving classes behind and all that...

Plus, G'raha's less than secretive ears.]

It probably meant the world to her if she hadn't been able to go on these trips with your friends before.

There was a more personal stake in it for Krile, truth to be told. Galuf had raised the both of us, yes, but she had essentially found her. Thus she had questions of her own upon assisting with the process of selecting the next Dawnservant.

[ He doesn't know the entire journey, not just yet. Though he does tell Zack of the results - of Wuk Lamat winning and proclaiming herself and her brother, Koana, as Dawnservant together.

And then what had followed after. The dome. Zoral Ja's attack and declaration. Krile getting in contact with him about it all. ]

This is where my schematics for a mounted cannon come into play, you see.

[It's a very good tale to listen to. A bonafide coming-of-age story, and Zack enjoys G'raha telling it. He wonders if he would have had such an interesting life if he had been able to travel the world as a mercenary, like he and Cloud first dreamed about.

And then the story gets a little crazy...]

Hold on. Your schematics for a mounted cannon?

[... G'raha. Cool.]

[ Zack looks a little stumped. A little mind blown by what it is Raha is telling him. Does the man think that they only have magic at their disposal?

He chuckles. ]

Yes. The Crystarium was in need of defenses, if not from SinEaters then the potential for other factions to attack. Protection had been needed then and at the time, the train needed the same sort of protection. I only offered what had already been done.

[Zack grins.]

You never stop amazing me, Raha. You're a military strategist too, huh. I guess I should have guessed.

[He sighs proudly.]

Tell me all about how you built a bunch of cannons.

Now, I wouldn't say I am amazing in that regard. In nine decades with reliable individuals to support me and my goals, I would say that I've merely picked upon on a few things.

[ He knows enough to get by. That's all. So G'raha continues his tale. Mentions how they needed the means to protect the train from both airborne threats as well a means to soak up any ambient aether so that they could crash when needed.

G'raha talks about the infiltration of Vanguard and the strange, "futuristic" machines and 'people.' Everything had been so different than what they had known. Breathtaking, but also terrifying. ]

The man at the end, he fully transformed into some kind of monster. At the time, we knew not how he had managed to do this.

Some kind of monster... It always comes down to that and power.

[Zack shakes his head.]

What happened next?

Aye. So oft it does. There are many a times where I wonder where such a burning need comes from. All I can think would be desperation. For what, I cannot say.

[ G'raha continues to tell Zack of the events that had transpired. Their discoveries regarding the passage of time and the use of souls. Memory extracted from a person as soon as a 'final death' has transpired. G'raha talks about the layout of the area in great detail - how it is marred and scarred by constant levin raining down and the build up.

He speaks of Erenville and the Viera's mother. About their encounter with Sphene and the tale that she had told them. But then goes into great detail about the lifestyles of those in Everkeep. His eyes begin to sparkle. Ears flick about. Despite everything, it would seem that G'raha had been quite excited by seeing this new realm. ]

Desperation, validation, needing something more out of their existence. It's all kinds of stuff.

[That's a little deep coming from Zack Fair but he does have opinions on that. He's watched a mad man destroy everything for power. And because of all three of those things.

As G'raha continues, Zack listens and moves so he's laying back down on the bed. The story is getting good. Crazy... but good. Using souls?? Everkeep??]

You sounds like you were pretty excited to see it all. Even if it sounds insane.

[ Zack can be incredibly deep, when he wishes to be. Raha is always fascinated and drawn in more during those moments. He adores the carefree Zack that is all smiles and fun. The one that shows his joy for all to see. But he also wishes to hold the more vulnerable Zack against his chest. Keep it close to his own heart so that it might be protected.

The truth of Everkeep, though, is quite far-fetched. The entirety of the situation is a painful one, which G'raha soon explains. Electrope. Wars. The land being nigh uninhabitable. Then the promise of being an Endless and the process of stripping memory from soul so that it can be reused. G'raha also talks about their discoveries about Alexandria being from another Shard - and even G'raha doesn't understand how such a thing could be achieved, them attaching themselves to the Source.

He continues his story up until the confrontation with Zoraal Ja. ]

To be fair, I understand the plight Sphene had found herself in. Preservation of her people could become all-consuming when the world is starting to fall apart. Each life lost begins to feel like a personal falure of your own. Though I would never go so far as to consume the aether of an entire world to -

[ G'raha pauses. Pushes himself up a little as he is struck with a thought. ]

No. In truth, I might have, if it came to that. There was a time when I, too, was so driven for all to survive that I did cause the suffering of one I wanted to save most. So perhaps I am not in a place to cast that sort of judgement.

[They end up talking well into the night. He's sure the moon is high in the sky right now and the rest of the ship is fast asleep. Zack will reach out to pull G'raha snug to his side.

As G'raha continues, Zack frowns. He can understand the sheer desperation to save people who can't save themselves, but to go as far as threaten another world in order to do that?]

Raha. You don't believe that, do you?

[He wants G'raha to explain who he means by the one who he wanted to save the most but had caused suffering anyway...? He doesn't understand this part.]

I can understand that this queen, Sphene, wanted to keep her people alive for as long as possible. But to hurt others in order to do that. You can't agree with that. At some point, we do have to learn to let go. Losing more lives in the end is never worth it.

[ He is pulled close to Zack. A tail attempts to wind itself around the other man - wherever it can. Raha himself is running fingers through Zack's hair, eyes looking down between them in thought. ]

Is that not what I have done already? It might have been at their request, but reality has been altered. There will be generations of individuals who will no longer be born and their lives were the price to save the present.

[ It's not QUITE the same, considering that it also means that life will continue on the star itself. For those future generations that will no longer be, there will also be an entire Shard that now has a future. Their star has a future. ]

Not to mention our success means an end to Emet-Selch's hopes and dreams of reviving his own people.

You can't count on what the future might be, you can only be who you are in the present moment.

[By now he has seen and listened to some of Emet-Selch's story. Zack had seen the echo of Emet-Selch's past burning away under meteorites and destruction. The Abyss fog had shown him more pain than he was prepared to see.

And he knows how persistent G'raha is when it comes to solving problems.

Emet-Selch, G'raha Tia as the Exarch, Queen Sphene... how alike and how different are they. It's a never ending question.]

If that changes the future? We won't know that, either. [It's impossible to know.] I think it's normal to wonder what we would do in the same shoes as someone else. But in the end... You're just you.

[Perhaps G'raha made some of the same decisions... But they all did what they thought was best. Is it really so bad?]

'Tis a bit more complex for me, as I am both a person from the present moment and one that has experienced the future that will no longer be.

[ He softly smiles at Zack, knowing that the man means well. Zack is trying to tell G'raha that he can't possibly know how things are going to work out now. The future has, indeed, changed but it's not quite possible to know how it will look on down the line.

His hand touches Zack's cheek. A thumb moving across the scar there. ]

It is difficult, you see, to be just me. In this situation, though I empathize, I know that the dead need to rest and the living need to find a way to move forward. Sphene was just as much a Primal in some ways - a repository of wishes placed upon her by the people that came before. Still, it is a difficult thing to reconcile this fact, as the Endless themselves seem to be so alive.

[ but they aren't... They are merely echoes of those who are already gone. ]

[Zack smiles ruefully. The answer is always complex when it comes to G'raha Tia.]

But if they were living on... basically loop, were they really alive? As the same people as they were when they were actually living? I don't know.

[He leans into G'raha's touch.]

I know you'd try your best for the people around you, though. In the end, I feel bad for the queen too.

[Impossible choices for impossible results. It's bittersweet.]

The Endless do not have aether of their own and their soul is gone. It is akin to watching a memory. One cannot truly call them alive any longer.

[ But it really is a complicated thing. No one really wants to say goodbye to their loved ones. So as he continues to stroke Zack's cheek, Raha sighs. Zack thinks so highly of him... Telling the Miqo'te that he is different from the others. ]

Aye. Though, at the end, it is good to point out there there was a high chance that this method would not have been supported by the original Sphene. The one we met was still influenced by those who cobbled all those memories together.

[A very complicated thing.

Zack lets out a breath as G'raha strokes his cheek. And he leans forward to brush his lips over G'raha's brow.]

I think you guys made the right choice in the end. Even if it was hard to.

[...]

And I'm glad you're back too.

[ There are many things to do back home, upon his star. Matters that still need to be settled. Mysteries to unravel. However, G'raha also enjoys the place that he has found here. Both metaphorically and literally, as lips brush his brow. ]

My companions usually do, yes. I am fortunate to be able to aid and assist.

[ Also known as Raha once more downplaying his own achievements and the like. Hopefully Zack won't argue though. Now he is settling against the other man fully. Taking in a deep breath and moving his hand to hug that arm around the other. ]

More importantly, I am fortunate to find you here once more.

[Whenever Zack listens to stories about G'raha's home world and all the of the insane adventures he gets up to with his friends ... Zack does wonder if someday he'll return to all of that for good. It's not like Zack's story. His story is over. He's certain he has nothing to go back to in his home world, and that the planet-saving is all up to Cloud and the others. But G'raha has so much more to see and tell.

If he's honest. A part of that hurts Zack's heart.]

Yeah, you say that. But I know you're always a big star of the story.

[Even without seeing things for himself, Zack can tell that G'raha shines in what he does. He's a good mark on his home world.

But anyway... He's feeling the sleepiness creep up. He holds G'raha closer.]

We'd find each other somehow, eventually. Right?

[ Raha chuckles. He disagrees with Zack, of course, especially with this latest chapter. Krile and the others had a great deal more to do with the events that had transpired. He had only been there to assist when called upon. Of course it meant that, then, he played a larger role. Yet the star will always be his companion, his friend.

Then Zack pulls him closer and murmurs. G'raha's ears perk up and forward. Eyes widen. Suddenly he is aware of what might yet concern Zack. Find one another again, he says. There is a pain in his chest, realizing that they may yet part ways.

He presses his forehead against Zack's best as he is able. ]

As me and mine found a means to return wayward souls to their home proper, I will find the means to find you. To keep you, if you still desire me.

[It's a little bittersweet. Zack has yet to tell G'raha the full truth about his future. Or- lack thereof. Which makes these sorts of thoughts all the more hard to deal with when they sneak in.

His arms scoop around G'raha, fingers feeling the shape and the warmth of the other man's back. Slow, sleepy and appreciative fingers making lines up and down his spine.]

When you say it, it sounds like something I can believe.

[G'raha has this way of being so determined that he really could move stars.]

Don't think how I feel about you will ever change.

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