escordvi | log 🌻 in the absence of sunshine

Entry tags:

darin altway,
zelda

log 🌻 in the absence of sunshine

Who: Zelda and Darin
Status: Closed
Where: Zelda's apartment on Eltrut
What: (Backdated to August 15) The aftermath of their fight with Ganondorf the previous night.
Warnings: Major injury, probably some PTSD, and other such warnings that come with hurt/comfort threads (edit: now with themes of self sacrifice, self loathing, and some surprise UST 🌶️)

[ These past twenty-four hours have been the longest, slowest hours Zelda has had to wait through in a very long time. After her century sealing Calamity Ganon, the princess has developed patience in spades-- in stark contrast to how she was before the Calamity. But now, that patience seems to have evaporated and she feels just like that girl she once was, standing impatiently for hours in the Goddess's springs straining to hear Her voice. Time passes with agonizing slowness, and each hour that Darin does not wake feels somehow slower than the last.

Zelda has seen firsthand how quickly his injuries heal, no matter how severe. When she rescued him from the ocean after his fight with Garuda, it took less than an hour for his broken bones to heal. So although the severity of the injuries he sustained from their fight with Ganondorf were deeply upsetting to Zelda, she expected him to heal through the worst of them before the following dawn.

But that wasn't the case. When dawn came, not only did his injuries barely look any better, but he hadn't hadn't regained consciousness. Dawn turned to day to afternoon to dusk and to night again and still Darin did not wake.

Throughout those long, long hours, there was nothing Zelda could do but wait. Wait and try to treat his wounds as she would anyone else's. She cleaned and bandaged his injuries as best she could, and at least that helped set her mind slightly at ease. She didn't know why this was taking so long, but she could care for him through that time. Goddess knows she had done so for Link countless times in the past.

But first aid only went as far as normal wounds. It was all but useless for treating Gloom burns. Usually, the cure for Gloom sickness was sunlight; Gloom faded away in the light and a person's vitality returned over time. Zelda had never seen Gloom burns before she and Link found the corpse of the Demon King below Hyrule Castle. She had an idea how to treat them-- a poultice made of sundelions might work like a concentrated salve of sunlight. But there are no sundelions in this world and the process for trying to fish for them through the rift was tricky and time consuming. And even if it wasn't, Zelda couldn't risk leaving Darin alone. If something happened... If she wasn't here...

These are the thoughts that have gone round and round in her mind all day, interspersed among memories of that fight with Ganondorf. Everything he said. Everything he did. How even the combined efforts of Darin, Ranma, and Zelda were barely enough to injure him at all. She couldn't get these thoughts out of her head.

Now it's nighttime again. Zelda has barely eaten and she has staunchly avoided sleep-- not just because Darin is on her bed, but because if something were to happen and she was not here beside him.... Well, she wasn't willing to risk that. But after twenty four sleepless hours, even anxiety isn't strong enough to keep her awake. The princess finally nods off sometime in the middle of the night, sitting in her chair at the bedside and leaning against the edge of the bed, her head against his shoulder so that, if he shifts, the movement will wake her. ]

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[ Believe it or not, Zelda is actually starting to get used to Darin just casually lifting his shirt or taking it off around her. Not that she doesn't still get a little flustered by it (because seriously, look at him), but at least she isn't panicking and turning away every time. She even leans in a little to get a better look at how he's healing. The gash is looking a lot better than it did yesterday, although the lingering marks of Gloom worry her, both here and on his arms. (She really needs to try to get some sundelions.) But she's satisfied that he hasn't reopened anything, so she straightens up and gives her nod of approval.

Once the bed is made up and heaped with all of the new pillows and blankets Darin bought her, Zelda stands beside him and admires it for a moment. It's bigger than she realized it was going to be! --Or maybe she's just so used to narrow, worn out mattress that she's been using since she moved in. And with all the pillows, it actually looks a lot like her old bed in Hyrule Castle.

Zelda starts to give Darin a sincere answer when a thought strikes her. She tilts her head to the side in a show of concentration. ]

Well, it looks lovely, but the real test is how it feels.

[ She walks around one side of the bed, tapping her chin. Her eyes flick to Darin and a wicked little grin forms on her lips. Then she jumps up and flings herself onto the mattress, landing on her back with a muffled TWUMP and sinking into the cushy comforter.

If Darin doesn't immediately follow her, Zelda will proper herself up on her elbows and look at him expectantly. ]

Well...?

[Darin's eyes almost fall out of his head when Zelda flings herself onto her new bed. He'd always seen her so reserved and proper and seeing her like this...]

[He really can't fight the massive smile spreading across his face.]

[This. This is what he wants to see. Zelda unrestrained by propriety was just so charming and fun! He'd caught a glimpse of this during their toad mucus foray but now? Now it felt like he was truly seeing her and it felt so godsdamned special. Like something only he was allowed to witness.]

[That expectant look makes his heart do a flip and he eyes the bed with a hint of apprehension.]

W...Well...

[He glances at her one more time then back to the spot on the bed she was gesturing to invitingly. That certainly was giving him ideas.]

[Bashfully, he rubs the back of his head and...excuses himself to her living room. Zelda would be forgiven if she thought maybe she crossed a line...]

[Except a second later she'll hear heavy footsteps as Darin gets a running start and leaps into her bed with enough force to propel her off of the mattress and on top of his laughing frame.]

Edited 2024-09-10 22:01 (UTC)

[ At first, Darin smiles at her. Which makes Zelda's smile widen in turn. She had a feeling that her antics might amuse him. There was a brief moment where, as she looked at the fluffy bed, she remembered Darin flinging himself onto the bed in the hotel room on the Naughtilust. And she remembered doing that exact same thing as a little girl.

So why not do it now too? Because she's an adult? Because she's a princess? And hasn't Darin been encouraging her not only to want things, but to pursue those wants?

All of these thoughts go through Zelda's mind as she impatiently waits for Darin to join her...

... Except he turns around and leaves the room instead.

Her smile immediately dissolves and worry rushes into her mind. Did she go too far? Was that too childish? Is he upset that her first decision was to jump onto the bed paid so much for and worked hard to put together because she could have broken it or--

And then all of the sudden he comes sprinting back into the room and dives onto the bed. Zelda lets out a shriek as she feels herself bounced off the mattress high into the air and then plummets back down, landing right on top of Darin.

She's just about howling with laughter from the adrenaline of being launched into the air as she remains laying on top of Darin. Her face is all flushed red with breathlessness and tiny tears sting the corners of her eyes. ]

[His laughter simmers enough that he can truly appreciate the sound of Zelda's own laughter. It's astounding how this is the same girl who can have such a commanding presence...how her every move is graceful and practiced. A show of propriety for the world. And yet here he gets to see her for who she is. It was like basking in radiant sunshine. Warm and bubbly, it rolls over him in waves.]

[His wide grin softens into a look of pure adulation. It's like all at once he understands why knights would go to war and die for their princesses. Why they'd compete for their favor. An entire kingdom could rally behind such a beautiful smile.]

[His heart pounds and he's forced to acknowledge something he never thought he'd truly get to experience.]

[Darin might have a crush on Zelda.]

[It's a bittersweet thing because he knows that he could never act on it. She has a home someplace else. But what he can do is make her life here as happy as possible. He can stand with her against Gaondorf. Safeguard her and see her through until she can return to the kingdom who needs her.]

[So, that's what he'll do for her. As her support. Her smith. He'll forge a path to her future with his own hands. Even a future without him.]

[It's the least he could do for the care she's shown him.]

[She might find him staring at her with that same warm smile— his green eyes seeing nothing else in the room but her.]

I think the bed passes my test. What about you?

How's it feel...?

[ Zelda's riotous laughter gradually softens until it's just a chuckle as she gazes down at Darin fondly. They're in a similar position to the one they were in last night, Darin lying on his back beneath her and Zelda laying across his chest. But instead of getting her all riled up, it makes her feel... happy. Happy in a way that feels new and different from other times she's been happy.

What is it about this happiness that makes it so different? It keeps tugging at her heart whenever she and Darin lapse into these little moments together. For awhile, she thought this was the same feeling of closeness she shares with Link. But over the past few days, Zelda has started to think that it might be... different. How and why, she cannot begin to guess. But there's just something, something she can't put her finger on just yet, about the way Darin makes her feel that is different from Link.

And she likes it.

At his question, Zelda comes back from her musings. Her head cants just slightly to one side, as though she's studying his face from a different angle. Whatever she sees, it causes her smile to shift into something quirked and knowing. ]

It feels perfect.

[ And she does not elaborate, letting that assessment hang in the air between them. ]

Yeah...

Yeah it...really does, doesn't it?

[A couple of days ago, Darin would probably be feeling panicked right now. A beautiful princess laying on top of him on her bed? There's only a few other ways things could possibly get more intimate than this and...frankly? He's not entirely against any of them anymore.]

[But this feels right.]

[It feels normal.]

[It feels so normal that he can't help but huff a quiet laugh.]

It...feels so perfect, it's a shame I have to leave...

[ Zelda deflates. Ah, that's right, Darin has his own apartment he should probably be getting back to. He doesn't need to stay with her any longer. It's not as though he needs her to take care of him anymore. The worst of his injuries have closed completely and even the Gloom poisoning doesn't seem to be bothering him anymore.

But she doesn't want him leave yet. Even though it's only been two days (well, one if you don't count the day he spent unconscious with fever), it's been nice to have another person in the house. Zelda has grown accustomed to living alone and Pumpkinpatch has definitely helped, but she misses living with someone. ]

You could stay a little longer, if you like. It is late. [ It is not. ] Why not wait until morning?

[Darin looks at her, a little surprised. She wants him to stay? Where would he sleep? He wouldn't mind sleeping on the floor but...]

[He glances to their side at the bed they're lying in. At the bed she's currently lying on top of him in. And he feels his throat tighten. Zelda did just receive traumatic news. Would it be right to just...leave her? He might not be far but...]

[...Well, he should be honest with himself. He's not exactly keen on leaving either. Today was just...nice. He wants more of that. But...]

[He can't impose. He's made too many assumptions about Zelda.]

[He levels his gaze to her.]

If...If that's what you want...

I don't mind staying until you feel like you'll be okay...

I should be recovered enough that I can sleep out in the living room...

[He's making the offer to sleep out there but his eyes are watching hers. They both know what he's really asking. He's asking the princess—his princess— where she wants him to sleep.]

[ At the moment, Zelda's mind is blissfully empty of traumatic thoughts... although chances are high that those thoughts will creep back in when she's alone. For as much as she was able to grieve with Darin last night, she will still need more time. Zelda is well versed in the grieving process, but that doesn't make it any easier each time she goes through it.

She sees the question in Darin's eyes, the one she easily reads through an offer of propriety. A bit odd to hear from him, given not only that he has little regard for such things and he was the one to suggest sleeping together last night.

But that was under more serious circumstances. He probably could sleep in her sofa chair without it adversely effecting his recovery.

And yet... ]

I think there is ample space in this new bed for both of us to sleep comfortably.

[ Her eyes say it more clearly: she wants him to sleep here with her. ]

[And as it seems to be with their dynamic, he gives voice to her wants. He makes them reality.]

[He simply nods, smiling albeit a little sheepishly.]

...Th-Then, I want to stay. With you. For...as long as you want me.

[Gods when she looks at him like that he feels his cheeks burning hot. There's a lot of 'want' in her green eyes and he's still so unaccustomed to being a part of that list.]

Sh...Should we call it an early night then...?

[ For as long as she wants him, huh? An impulsive part of her wants to say "forever." Waking up and having breakfast with him, spending the day together, and now relaxing in her new bed... it all feels so nice. She has missed this kind of company. And company means not being alone with her thoughts. With her memories. With loss.

But she doesn't say it. She just gives a hum of acknowledgement and a nod of her head. Until she feels like she'll be okay, he said. (How long with that take this time, she can't help but wonder. Will it be easier to grieve for Sonia thanks to all of the experience she had grieving after the Calamity?)

Zelda doesn't want to think about grief right now. She had a good day; she wants it to last a little bit longer. ]

I think we should, yes. We had a full day and neither of us are completely recovered yet. We should rest.

[ And she is tired. Now that she is relaxing, she can feel the exertion of the day creeping over her. It would be nice to just... lay here together. Talk. Relax. Drift off to sleep again, like last night. ]

Yeah...honestly, I think another full night's sleep would do us both good...

I can make you another breakfast then we can go shopping so I can replace all of the food I ate on you.

[He laughs a little, an apologetic look in his eyes.]

So...I guess we should...change?

[His...cheeks start to color at the thought. What...does Zelda wear to bed? Darin sleeps in boxers and...that's it. Surely she won't want him to sleep like that here...]

[Would she?]

[But his mind is already getting filled with thoughts and...not all of them are the most pure.]

[He clears his throat awkwardly.]

I...think I have some shorts I can wear. I usually just...sleep in my boxers...

[ Zelda, initially, thinks nothing of Darin's suggestion to change clothes. A nightgown would definitely be preferable to sleeping in her day clothes, like she did last night. It didn't keep her awake, but it certainly felt unpleasant when she woke up.

So she doesn't understand why he's blushing until he continues.

Ah. He simply.. sleeps in his underclothes.

For once, it's a good thing that she's still on top of him, because just the mention that he sleeps in his boxers makes Zelda start to automatically look down... And, realizing what she's doing and how their current position inhibits her wandering gaze, she jerks her head back up. ]

Should we have bought sleepwear for you while we were out?

[ Because, well, given how Zelda's hormones have been getting the better of her over the past two days, sharing a bed with Darin while he's barely wearing anything at all sounds like a recipe for disaster. ]

N-No, it's fine! I have shorts and a tanktop I can wear! D-Don't worry, I'd never sleep in your bed like that...!

[He protests strongly, trying to assure Zelda he would never sully her virtue that way. But he still can't fight the mental images dancing in his mind.]

S...Should I change in the bathroom...? Or...?

[ Zelda laughs as Darin flusters beneath her. He sounds so distraught! For the umpteenth time, she finds herself musing on how cute he is when he's like this, which helps her to keep from thinking about him laying in her bed wearing only his underwear. ]

You can change in here. [ She climbs off of his chest and climbs out of the bed. Opening her wardrobe, she fishes out a fresh nightgown. ] I will use the bathroom so that I can brush out my hair. I imagine you will be done before me.

[ Without waiting for him to agree, Zelda slips to the bathroom and closes the door behind her. They could have just taken turns using the bathroom, but she's pretty confident in this timing.

Indeed, it's nearly fifteen minutes later when she cracks the bathroom door open and knocks on it to warn of her return. ]

[Darin only caught a glimpse of the nightgown and...was at least thankful it was more conservative than he was imagining. Of course it would be, Zelda certainly didn't seem like that type of girl...]

[But he can't seem to shake the mental image. So he quickly stands up and strips down...before digging his clothes out of the bag. Had he been thinking clearly, he would have retrieved his clothes first but...]

[Well, he's not thinking clearly.]

[He selects a loose tank top and gym shorts; clothes that he'll be able to begin training in, and sits on the edge of the bed, arms propped up by his knees and hands clasps in front of his face. Just what the hell was he so nervous about??]

[When she cracks the door open and knocks, he bolts upright, his voice cracking a bit as he speaks.]

C-Come in...?

I-I mean...it's good, I'm...I'm dressed...!

Edited 2024-09-15 04:47 (UTC)

[ Zelda opens the door fully to let herself into the bedroom and then closes it behind her. Indeed, her nightgown is more conservative than some of the designs that have probably been running through Darin's mind-- a simple cream-colored nightgown with a wide scooped neckline and the hem cut just below her knees, something light and breathable for summertime.

When she turns to see Darin standing bolt upright beside the bed she raises one brow. Why in the world does he seem so nervous? Surely this can't be because they're about to share the same bed-- he's the one who suggested it in the first place last night, and he hardly seemed nervous then. So why should he be nervous now? ]

You look nice. [ She offers the casual compliment in attempt to dispel some of his nervousness as she tosses her worn clothes into a basket for washing and heads to the opposite side of the bed. ] We did well today.

Y-Yeah...thanks...I like the things you picked out for me.

They're really comfortable...

[Darin's honestly relieved that Zelda's wearing something conservative. So relieved that he says the first thing that pops into his mind.]

You look pretty.

Cute.

Pretty cute.

[GODS DAMMIT.]

H-Hey let's...you know! Get into bed!

[Darin immediately turns and climbs into the bed, hurriedly trying to hide himself beneath the plush comforter and copious amounts of pillows. There's a shock of blue hair poking out but she might need to go on an expedition to properly find him.]

[ "Pretty," "cute," and "pretty cute" are hardly salacious compliments, so Zelda doesn't read into them at all. She simply chuckles with amusement as Darin dives into her bed to hide his embarrassment. It's rather charming!

Zelda moves around to the other side of the bed and climbs into it. She lays down on her side and props her chin up with her elbow against the mattress, watching the lump under the covers with a quirked smile. ]

Are you planning to hide under there all night?

[Gods above what the hell was wrong with him? Why was he getting so embarrassed? He really needed to get his head under control. Even if he did have a crush on her, it's not like she liked him that way.]

[Even though her words the night before were so full of conviction. That she chose him and Ranma over the people they'd set out to save.]

[She chose him...]

[And gods did he react poorly. She really deserved an explanation.]

[Darin huffs a bit and wiggles out from under the comforter to lay on his back.]

Hey...I know this is a weird time to mention it but...I'm...sorry for the way I acted last night.

I'm not...really used to people caring about me and it just...confuses me. It's not you.

[He laughs sheepishly.]

Hell, I haven't been hugged since my dad died. Acteon was a lot of things but he wasn't really a hugger. Headlock, hair tousle, back slap sure but...I guess I just get confused when someone actually wants me...

[ Zelda's expression softens into something thoughtful. Even though he has already apologize to her twice, once last night and once this afternoon over breakfast, she doesn't interrupt him. This time is a little bit different-- less about asking for forgiveness and more about offering an explanation.

Darin's description of his adoptive father brings an image of Daruk to Zelda's mind, along with the rough sort of affection he used to give to Link. Not many Hylians could walk away from a back slap from a Goron. ]

That sounds quite lonely. [ She offers, a gentle encouragement for him to continue. ]

[Darin scoffs.]

You don't know the half of it.

[He turns his head toward her as he pushes himself a little more onto his side.]

I wasn't allowed to go to school and...well, none of the kids my age wanted anything to do with me. They all repeated the things their parents said behind closed doors.

I've had rocks thrown at my more times than I can count and the cries of "monster" didn't exactly let up when they saw the cuts heal up right away.

...Just kinda...encouraged more stone throwing. Literally.

[He heaves a sigh and rests his head on the fluffy pillow. He's never really talked this openly about his life growing up in Kenmore but...Zelda deserved to know.]

Over time they stopped openly ridiculing me. They went off to schools. Lived their lives. Before long I was the only person my age in town.

...So...when you say you'd choose me over the world it just...doesn't make sense. I've never had someone other than Acteon or Kessler ever...

Ever...actually want me...

Heh, you're the first girl my age who actually spoke to me without looking down her nose at me...

[ She listens quietly. Some of these things she does know-- that he wasn't allowed to go to school, that he was reviled as a monster, that he was always alone-- but they stir an ache in her heart all the same. Zelda grew up lonely herself, kept at a distance from most other children because she was a princess, but what Darin describes sounds far worse. Like complete solitude.

But it also sounds unfathomable. She doesn't think Darin is lying about this, but it's hard to believe none of the children in his hometown ever gave him a chance, that none of the girls his age dared to challenge the idea that he was "cursed." With how attractive and charming he is, Zelda automatically assumed that he had dated and been intimate before. ]

Then I am left to assume that all of the women in Alvale collectively suffer from some sort of... madness, I suppose. [ There's a hint of levity in her tone. ] How else can one explain why none of them have ever seen what I see?

[ It is a rhetorical question and she doesn't give him the chance to try to answer. ]

I wish I had something better than words to explain why I want you in my life. I hate that my care challenges you as much as it does.

[Darin shakes his head vigorously.]

No. No, don't. I'm honestly...I'm thankful. Today was so much fun. I've never gone out with a girl my age before!

[He laughs a bit, not realizing that his descriptors really do make it sound like they were on a date.]

I just...I know I'm going to be difficult at times. I'm not going to understand why sometimes but...

What you said earlier? The um...the things you said you'd say about me...?

[He rolls onto his back, the color starting to rush to his cheeks again.]

They're...the nicest things anyone's ever said about me...

[For once, Darin's bravado vanishes. His fear and uncertainty melt away. And all that's left is a young man trying to navigate his feelings. This vulnerability he's trained himself to hide from the world...it's all on full display for Zelda to see.]

[This is who he is.]

A-And...I mean, it's not just the women. The men too! Everyone!

[Because he feels the need to stress that it wasn't just women who were the problem. For some reason.]

[ There's just a flicker of surprise across Zelda's features when Darin decides to stress that men were also a problem. Ah, then is he...? Well, so is she; it's hardly a bad thing. She just didn't expect to find out like this. So Zelda nods sympathetically, believing (perhaps mistakenly) that he has just come out to her as bisexual.

Ooops?

Not that that has any impact what she thinks of him, so the thought is a brief one. ]

I meant every word of it.

[ Zelda shifts position, folding both of her arms and tucking them beneath her pillow. ]

And I expect there are more people in this world who share them, voiced or not.

[ She pauses, and a soft fondness seeps into her features. ]

I've never spent a day like this with a boy my own age. Or anyone, really. As the Princess of Hyrule countless times... but never as Zelda.

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