escordvi | log 🌻 in the absence of sunshine

Entry tags:

darin altway,
zelda

log 🌻 in the absence of sunshine

Who: Zelda and Darin
Status: Closed
Where: Zelda's apartment on Eltrut
What: (Backdated to August 15) The aftermath of their fight with Ganondorf the previous night.
Warnings: Major injury, probably some PTSD, and other such warnings that come with hurt/comfort threads (edit: now with themes of self sacrifice, self loathing, and some surprise UST 🌶️)

[ These past twenty-four hours have been the longest, slowest hours Zelda has had to wait through in a very long time. After her century sealing Calamity Ganon, the princess has developed patience in spades-- in stark contrast to how she was before the Calamity. But now, that patience seems to have evaporated and she feels just like that girl she once was, standing impatiently for hours in the Goddess's springs straining to hear Her voice. Time passes with agonizing slowness, and each hour that Darin does not wake feels somehow slower than the last.

Zelda has seen firsthand how quickly his injuries heal, no matter how severe. When she rescued him from the ocean after his fight with Garuda, it took less than an hour for his broken bones to heal. So although the severity of the injuries he sustained from their fight with Ganondorf were deeply upsetting to Zelda, she expected him to heal through the worst of them before the following dawn.

But that wasn't the case. When dawn came, not only did his injuries barely look any better, but he hadn't hadn't regained consciousness. Dawn turned to day to afternoon to dusk and to night again and still Darin did not wake.

Throughout those long, long hours, there was nothing Zelda could do but wait. Wait and try to treat his wounds as she would anyone else's. She cleaned and bandaged his injuries as best she could, and at least that helped set her mind slightly at ease. She didn't know why this was taking so long, but she could care for him through that time. Goddess knows she had done so for Link countless times in the past.

But first aid only went as far as normal wounds. It was all but useless for treating Gloom burns. Usually, the cure for Gloom sickness was sunlight; Gloom faded away in the light and a person's vitality returned over time. Zelda had never seen Gloom burns before she and Link found the corpse of the Demon King below Hyrule Castle. She had an idea how to treat them-- a poultice made of sundelions might work like a concentrated salve of sunlight. But there are no sundelions in this world and the process for trying to fish for them through the rift was tricky and time consuming. And even if it wasn't, Zelda couldn't risk leaving Darin alone. If something happened... If she wasn't here...

These are the thoughts that have gone round and round in her mind all day, interspersed among memories of that fight with Ganondorf. Everything he said. Everything he did. How even the combined efforts of Darin, Ranma, and Zelda were barely enough to injure him at all. She couldn't get these thoughts out of her head.

Now it's nighttime again. Zelda has barely eaten and she has staunchly avoided sleep-- not just because Darin is on her bed, but because if something were to happen and she was not here beside him.... Well, she wasn't willing to risk that. But after twenty four sleepless hours, even anxiety isn't strong enough to keep her awake. The princess finally nods off sometime in the middle of the night, sitting in her chair at the bedside and leaning against the edge of the bed, her head against his shoulder so that, if he shifts, the movement will wake her. ]

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[ Zelda can feel the change in Darin before he even speaks. As his hand covers hers, she lets out a soft sigh of relief, a breath she hadn't realized she was holding.

She lightly shakes her head, a little smile blooming on her lips. ] Not at all.

[ Zelda leans forward, softly touching her forehead to his. ] I will remind you every day, every hour, if that is what it takes.

[Darin gives a week little laugh as a little color dusts his cheeks.]

Heh...I'm going to hold you to that...

My stubborn Sunshine...

[He reaches out with his other hand and reels her in, keeping their foreheads touching.]

...Are you alright...? I should have asked...I'm...I'm sorry...

[ Her eyes fall closed as he pulls her in she laughs lightly in turn. His stubborn Sunshine... She has to be, doesn't she? How else is she supposed to get through to him? Her stubborn blacksmith... ]

It's all right. [ She assures him quietly. ] I am all right- [ She starts, then clarifies ] -Uninjured, at least. You protected me until the last.

But I am very tired. I used far too much of my power last night and it will take quite some time to recover it.

[Darin simply nods. He's still so emotionally raw. His eyes might be closed but Zelda's presence is a balm— his body feels heavy and his spirit feels sluggish but with her proximity he feels his churning, surging emotions begin to quiet.]

[He wants to apologize more. As if being told 'it's alright' meant that it was anything but. But pressing the matter was fruitless now. He'd find some way to make it up to her; to make it right when his mind was clearer.]

Mm...me too. Everything hurts...I've never felt like this before...

[He exhales slowly, his mind wandering.]

Thank you for...for saving me, Zelda. I'm sorry that I couldn't stop him for you...

Hush. We did what we could. [ She scolds him gently, intentional in her use of "we." He is not solely responsible for defeating Ganondorf; they will face him together. ] Later, we will reassess the situation and plan our next course of action.

But right now, you are my priority. Your injuries are not healing as quickly as they normally do and you have been burning with with fever for almost an entire day. I've tried to treat you as best I could, but I fear you've reopened some of your wounds.

Would you please return to bed so that I can change the dressings? [ She rubs her thumb over his cheek again, in hopes that her gentleness will coax him to obey. ]

[He nods, leaning into her touch again. Gods above he never thought he could enjoy something like this. The feel of her hand on his cheek is nothing like he's ever felt before and he reaches up to keep her hand there for a moment longer. If only he knew how to ask for something like this...]

[It's reluctant, but at least he manages to pull away from her enough so that he can start to push himself to his feet. His breathing is labored and his limbs are weak. Was this what it felt like to be sick? What an absolutely horrible feeling. For once, he's glad for his unnatural resilience.]

[But then he notices the bed. Her bed. And how it's drenched in sweat and blood and his heart sinks once more. What did he put her through? How could he do that to her? Reflexively, he opens his mouth.]

Gods, your bed. I'm...I'm s—...

[He stops himself. No, apologizing wouldn't change anything and Zelda would likely chide him for even saying so.]

...I'll replace it. The sheets. Anything I ruined...

[He slumps down on the edge of the bed and attempts to straighten up. Blood has begun to seep through the bandages around his body in a few spots and he takes a moment to look over himself.]

...Gods...[Zelda was right. He was going to kill himself against Ganondorf.]

[ Zelda shifts her hand to his arm as he stands, ready to try to support him if he falters, but he thankfully makes it to the bed without issue.

Ah, that's right. Her bedding is completely ruined. Zelda hadn't spared it a single thought ever since she had Ranma help her carry Darin into her apartment and lay him on her bed the previous night. After all, it's just a bed. Bedsheets and mattresses can be replaced; Darin's life cannot. ]

Nevermind that now. We can worry about it later.

[ She intentionally stops herself from telling him that it's all right and he doesn't need to worry it. He'll argue if she does and she really doesn't need that right now.

Zelda briefly steps away to collect a fresh blanket. It's a worn, ratty old thing, something that has been left behind by the apartment's previous tenant. She unfolds it and spreads it over the bed. It's not much, but better than having Darin lay down in bloody sheets. ]

All right, lay back.

[Darin nods dutifully and reclines back onto the bed. He tears his eyes away from his broken and battered frame to watch Zelda as she prepares to change his bandages.]

[He finds himself staring at her. He has no idea how long he was out for but it had to have been at least a day. It was still dark and everything felt hazy and weirdly dream-like. Like when you lose time to a terrible cold and feel generally disoriented.]

[How long had Zelda been holding a vigil over him? She looked terrible. Had she eaten? Slept? Did she really put herself through all of that for him?]

[And, what's more, to do this on the heels of facing down Ganondorf. Gods above she was so much stronger than he initially thought she'd be. No wonder he was willing to die for her. Who wouldn't? And maybe it's that notion that upsets her so fiercely. How many people had died for her?]

[Ganondorf's words during the fight burn in his mind as he begins to recall the details of the battle. He'd said something— something that seemingly broke Zelda and, in turn, caused his own emotions to flare white-hot.]

[He continues to watch Zelda for any signs, any indication of her thoughts in her green eyes as she works to change his bandages.]

[When she does, she'll find that the garish wound on his chest has opened up in several spots but has already begun to close itself again. It's as if Darin's stamina is working doubly as hard to keep his body together. But most concerning are the Gloom burns around the edges of the wound. They spread from the wound itself as if the cut itself had been cauterized by the Gloom itself. To anyone else, it would probably look infected or even necrotic. He's healing for sure...but this isn't something he'll recover from in a day. And there's no doubt that he'll have a scar. One to match the one splitting his back.]

...Mn. Definitely seen better days, haven't I..?

[He attempts to make a joke even though he knows Zelda won't find this a laughing matter.]

[ Blanket in place, Zelda collects her first aid supplies and set them on the chair where they'll be easy to reach while she works.

There is little about her inner thoughts that Darin will be able to read in her expression. Zelda is focused as she carefully removes the stained bandage covering the gash across his chest. All of her emotions have been carefully compartmentalized and put aside so that she can concentrate on the matter at hand.

But she can't hide her exhaustion so easily. Dark circles ring her eyes and her face looks pale and gaunt. It's clear that she has not slept and the only times she's eaten are when she felt her hands shaking too much to continue her work.

Indeed, she does not laugh at his attempted joke-- she doesn't even smile. Instead, she grimaces as she examines the wound. ]

I've never seen anything like it. [ Zelda reaches for a clean cloth, dampens it, and begins to clean the wound again. ] It's as though it is infected somehow, but not with any normal infection. [ She dabs the cloth lightly against the veins of Gloom webbing out from the injury. ] I fear it's Gloom.

['Gloom' seemed so needlessly dramatic a name for...whatever it was that was staining his body. And as much as Darin wants to crack another joke, he doesn't want to make light of Zelda's concern. Not tonight.]

What is Gloom...? What'd that bastard do to me...?

[He winces. The wound is still raw and upon closer examination, Zelda might see the Gloom seeping into the wound itself. As if it were trying to dig and adhere itself to Darin's very core.]

[His soul.]

[But his body seems to be fighting it as much as it can. He's locked in a stalemate. If his stamina gives out, the Gloom will find purchase.]

[ Zelda leans in closer, eyes narrowing. Even without Ganondorf's direct influence, his vile power wriggles like maggots feasting on decay, burrowing into Darin's would and spreading beneath his skin. She's never seen Gloom act so aggressively; it's almost closer to Malice. The princess has long wondered over the relationship between the two, because their similarities are undeniable and their source one in the same, but opportunities for closer study have been few and far between.

Unfortunately, this is a good opportunity to observe it, and she hates the prospect of doing so. ]

Gloom is a manifestation of Ganondorf's power. It is different from magic as you know it, as exists in this world. It is not elemental or aspected... well, not truly, but for the ease of understanding, it would not be incorrect to describe it as darkness given form.

[ Satisfied that Darin's wound is as clean as she can get it, Zelda sets aside the cloth and selects an ointment from among her series of jars. An antibiotic is not exactly what he needs, but it's the best she has.

Selecting a fresh cloth, she gently begins applying it to his wound. ]

It is Hatred-- pure, concentrated hatred, coupled with a lust for power and control. It literally saps the life out of anything it touches. In Hyrule, many were falling ill from coming into contact with it. Even breathing its miasma drains one of their vitality. However, in most cases, the patient was able to recover over time by recuperating in sunlight. But this... [ She gestures at the gash across his chest. ] ...and the burns on your arm are more severe than I have ever seen before, save for Link. No one has ever treated Gloom poisoning of this severity before.

[Darin watches her quietly, listening to her explanation while she goes about her work. He can't get over just how exhausted she looks and it makes his heart tighten up in his chest. But he knows if he told her to stop, to rest, she'd adamantly refuse.]

[Darin was honestly beginning to admire that strength.]

[If nobles in his world could be like her, Alvale would be such a beautiful place...]

[He's shaken from his thoughts as she dabs a particularly tender area on his chest. His muscles flutter and flex in response and he winces as he sucks in a breath.]

Lucky me, I guess...

[But something about what she said strikes him. About how this gloom was pure Hatred. He feels his mouth go dry at the implications. Especially because...]

I've...I've felt something like this before. The pain, the way my wounds aren't healing as quickly...

[He exhales slowly, shakily.]

The night my brother and father were killed...our assailants.

They were demons.

The wound on my back...I was bedridden for weeks. It didn't...it didn't heal the way other wounds did. That's why everyone was horrified that I even survived...

[ Zelda reflexively jerks back her hand when she feels Darin flinch under her touch, her brow tightening with worry. She mutters a soft "sorry" before lowering her hand again. This time, her touch is softer, slower. ]

Demons?

[ Zelda pauses, looking up from her ministrations. Hold on a minute, that doesn't make sense. ]

But why would the magic of demons hurt you like this? You carry half of their king's soul. Should you not be resistant to their magic?

[Darin scoffs and immediately regrets it as he chokes on a pained groan.]

I couldn’t tell you. I was just a kid. I always thought that maybe my body was just weak to magic. I don’t scar when I heal except for that one time.

[He averts his gaze for the first time since she started treating him. He’s never talked at length about what happened that night save for one person. Why would he? He only remembers a few things and everyone he tried to tell as a child either recoiled from in horror or reprimanded him for lying.]

[Only Acteon ever believed him.]

[He shifts in discomfort— not from Zelda’s touch but because he’s weighing how much he should say. He wants to ask her about what happened with Ganondorf. He’s monopolized her more than enough, after all.]

[ She only nods, looking down again and returning to her work. It makes sense that he doesn't know, he was only a child. And she forgets sometimes that he knows so little about his own powers. He has never tried to explore them, never tested himself. Little wonder he doesn't understand what's happening to him right now.

Zelda falls quiet. Her touch travels the rest of the way down his abdomen, applying the salve as carefully as possible. Although this wound has already begun to heal faster than it would on a regular human, that knowledge does not put her at ease. Twenty four hours of careful tending, and it took him only a few minutes to tear himself right open again.

She sets the cloth and ointment aside, but she does not rise to collect the bandages. She remains leaning over him, her gaze slowly traveling up his body. For how frequently he is injured, the only scar to marr his form is the one on his back. The rest of his skin is smooth and unmarked. Looking at him, no one would ever guess how many times he has broken and torn himself apart. It makes her wonder how many times that is. Doubtless far more than she would ever guess.

Her eyes roam to the Gloom burning his skin, marking his biceps and striking down the length of his form. Will it linger on his skin after his wounds finally heal? Will he carry the mark of Ganondorf's evil for the rest of his life?

...Will he regret protecting her every time he looks upon it?

Zelda's jaw clenches as guilt begins to well up inside her. ]

I'm sorry, Darin. If I had only done more, perhaps this never would have happened. He played me against myself. I never should have listened to him-- I knew he was trying to manipulate me-- but...

[ But the revelation that he had killed Sonia completely paralyzed Zelda. ]

[When Zelda falls silent; when she stops treating his wound Darin cants his head towards her. Did she see something wrong? But what he sees is that her gaze seems to almost be hundreds of miles away.]

[He's about to start sitting up when she speaks up, causing him to freeze in place. Of all the things he was expecting in that moment, an apology certainly wasn't it.]

[Instinctively, he wants to tell her that she shouldn't feel sorry. But Darin knows from experience that telling someone they "shouldn't feel" something only makes them want to feel it more. Invalidation doesn't make things better.]

[Darin looks her up and down and tries not to give in to raw emotion— he wants to console her. Help her. But if he's going to do that, he needs context.]

[He needs to know what happened.]

[Slowly, he pushes himself up to a sitting position. He makes soft grunts as slight twinges of pain spike through his body. He wants to tell her it'll be alright. That he'll be alright. But something makes him think that he's only a part of the equation. If Darin bares one scar on his back, Zelda must bare hundreds on her heart.]

Zelda...

[He reaches out to take her hand in his. To try and prompt her to look him in the eye.]

During the fight...he said something. Before that moment you were fighting but the minute he said one thing it's like he stole the light from you.

[That was the moment that he began to lose his own control. When darkness seeped into his heart. He phrases his next question carefully— his usually strong voice barely above a whisper.]

Who is Queen Sonia...?

[From the sound of it, it almost seemed like Ganondorf struck down Zelda's mother. But...Zelda said her mother died when she was a child.]

[ Darin has her attention before he even reaches for her hand. As soon as she hears him grunt in pain, her gaze snaps to his. She opens her mouth to tell him not to sit up, but he speaks first... and something about the way he says her name sets her on edge.

She allows him to take her hand, her gaze remaining on his, just as he bids. Her breath stills, apprehension building in her breast as he speaks.

"Who is Queen Sonia...?"

Zelda's expression tightens, brows furrowing and lips pursing into a thin line. Part of her hoped that Darin had forgotten the things Ganondorf said. Although those words had been repeating endlessly in her mind for the past twenty four hours straight, she'd rather keep them locked away in there than let them out in the air. Giving them voice will make them real.

...But keeping them inside will not make them go away, and it will not bring Sonia back.

With her free hand, Zelda moves the medical supplies off her chair and sits down. ]

Queen Sonia is-- w-was-- [ Her voice quakes as she corrects herself. ] my distant ancestor, the first Queen of Hyrule, whom I met when I was sent back in time to that era. She and her husband, King Rauru, took me in and cared for me while I was trapped there, promising to help me find a way back to my time. I lived with them for several months.

Sonia... Sonia was so kind to me. [ A sad smile forms on Zelda's face, one that trembles as tears form in her eyes. ] She treated me like I was her own daughter. She welcomed me into her life with open arms, she and Rauru both.

It is from Sonia that I inherited my power over time, which had lain dormant in my family for eons, only to be awakened when I happened upon this secret stone. [ She lifts her free hand to her chest, touching the stone beneath her shirt. ] She began to teach me how to use that power, assuring me that I would one day be able to use it to return home.

[ Zelda's smile falters. ] Before I arrived here, Sonia and I were investigating a series of strange rumors that were going around the palace. Rumors of misdeeds I had committed. Sonia believed at once that I was being framed and we sought to uncover the truth. We suspected Ganondorf to be the one behind the acts, so we devised a plot to lure him out. [ She shakes her head. ] We were so careful. He couldn't have known what we were planning...

Edited 2024-09-02 04:12 (UTC)

['But he did.']

[He doesn't speak the words but he's sure Zelda knows. They hang between them. Despite his calm and focused demeanor, something inside of Darin churns and roils like boiling pitch.]

[Two mothers. Zelda had lost two mother-figures. Darin in some sense could comprehend, but only barely. He'd lost his birth father and his adopted father was taken into custody to ensure he could be free to clear his name. The weight of losing family is the worst burden of all to bear and he can't help but surmise that Zelda's is compounded by the weight of a kingdom.]

[What was that saying? 'Heavy is the head that wears the crown?']

[There's a part of him that wants to try and say something to give Zelda a glimmer of hope. That maybe Ganondorf was trying to trick her. But he quickly buries that notion. Darin had met Ganondorf twice and he can already surmise that he's not the type to throw regicide about lightly. If he said he did it...]

['He'll pay in blood for every tear he's made her shed.']

[That dark aggression spikes for but a moment but Darin wills it away with a rigorous shake of his head. No, Ganondorf will come later.]

[Zelda needs his focus now.]

[And right now, she's holding so much in. Gods he knows that look all too well.]

[Naturally, he has more questions, but for now...he feels like there's something Zelda needs to do more than anything.]

[Carefully, he reaches out and places a calloused hand to her cheek, just as she had done to him. He cringed inwardly— his hand must feel terrible to her. It's hard and leathery, cracked from years in the forge. Nowhere near the comforting delicate touch she'd shown him.]

[His thumb caress her cheek briefly before his hand slips around to the back of her head. It combs through her soft hair and he pulls her gingerly until her forehead is against his chest. Above his heart. And he rests his chin lightly atop her head.]

I'm sorry...

[His voice is a whisper— both an admission of empathy and a hand extended to do what Zelda likely never allows herself to do.]

[Mourn.]

[ It is the duty of the Princess of Hyrule to be valiant and steady.

That lesson was one of the first Zelda ever learned from her parents, a lesson that the death of her mother burned into her heart. A princess must be strong. A princess must not cry. A princess must be a beacon for her people.

And so, Zelda is strong. Zelda is a beacon. Zelda does not cry.

...Except, that's all she wants to do. She wants to cry, cry, and cry until there's nothing left inside her, until she is empty and hollow and no longer feeling the pain of having yet another person she loved ripped away from her.

Zelda is very good at holding back her tears, holding her grief deep in her heart where no one else can see it, for fear that it will weaken the resolve of those who look to her for strength.

So how is it that Darin sees through that so easily? How does he know to reach out to her, to place his hand upon her cheek, to beckon to the surface her honest feelings? The tears welling in her eyes grow as she feels his hand and she leans into his touch. His hand is so rough upon her cheek, tough and calloused from a lifetime of hard work. A touch unmistakably his.

There is momentary flash of confusion across her features as she feels his hand travel around to the back of her head and slip into her hair. He pulls her down against his chest and at first she doesn't understand what he means to do, but she doesn't resist him. Her forehead meets the warmth of his skin, slick with sweat from the fever he has burned all day. Her eyes close and, as they do, her sensitive ears pick up the beating of his heart.

"I'm sorry..."

His words are so quiet, so simple, but the emotion in his voice pulls at her heart like the moon pulls the tides and her grief comes pouring out. A choked sob wrenches from her throat as she begins to cry. Her slender shoulders shake violently as she buries her face against his chest and wails. She feels like it was her heart that was cut in two by Ganondorf's blade, festering as his Gloom eats away at her from the inside. After all of the lives lost during the Calamity, the deaths of her father and her Champions, and how she mourned and memorialized them when at last she was free from the seal-- after everything, everyone she has lost in her short life, the gods in heaven or whatever forces lie beyond her ken decree that it is somehow not enough and that she must lose yet another person she loves.

She cannot take it. Her heart cannot take it anymore. She cannot lose anyone else. If she does, she's certain her heart will simply give out.

Zelda stays like this for a long time, sobbing openly against Darin, making no attempt to cull her tears or pull away from him. It's not how a princess should behave. But it doesn't matter. All that matters is the pressure of his chin atop her head and the steady sound of his heartbeat in her ear. She doesn't have to be a princess with him. She can just be herself, Zelda, a woman who has lost someone precious to her, safe to let out the agony of her grief against him. ]

[Darin trains his eyes at whatever the hell is opposite of him. He trains them but his focus is so far beyond that singular point. It's miles, it's years away. The cries and wails and sobs that wrack this slight princess's frame ripple through him waves on a still lake. His heart simultaneously breaks for and is stoked by her.]

[How many people did this poor woman have to lose? How many people did he have to lose? How was it fair that two people had to bear the weight of worlds on their shoulders? Darin never questioned his fate— he's broad and can carry a load better than most. He was built for his path whether he likes it or not. But Zelda?]

[Zelda's lost so much that it's practically become her identity. What did she say before? She was 'Heir to a throne of nothing?']

[How cruel...]

... ... ...

[No.]

[No no no no no no.]

[No more loss. If fate conspires to strip them of everything he will deny it the pleasure.]

[As she cries he combs his hand through her hair, his large fingertips caressing her scalp. Once upon a time, this was a comforting touch his father, Dracer, would offer him and his brother. On those sunny afternoons in the flowerbed outside their home. Where they'd nap on their father's chest. And the more Zelda wept, the more Darin's own body began to shake.]

[Before long she'll feel warm droplets patter atop her head. How dare the universe, the gods, whoever take so much from someone so kind?]

[When her cries begin to soften, Darin finds his voice. It's calm but warm. Resolute.]

You don't deserve this. I might only have begun to learn who you are... but no person with a heart like yours deserve to feel so much loss...

[Slowly, he moves his chin away from the top of her head and releases the back of her head so that selfsame hand can move to cup her chin. Gently, he tilts her head so their matching emerald eyes meet.]

[The clouds have lazily wafted away from the moon and both her room and his face are awash in moonlight. She can plainly see the tears streaming down his face. But while his eyes scream of pain and loss, his smile defies fate.]

I'm no hero...hell, you've saved me more than I've done a damn thing for you. But if there's one thing I know...it's how to mend things.

I remember telling you once that even the wisest masters know when something can't be salvaged. Well, lucky you...I'm not particularly wise.

I can't bring the people you've lost back, Zelda, and I wouldn't ever dream of replacing them.

But...if you'll let me...

[He offers her one of the most genuine smiles he's ever given someone. He knows there isn't a lot he can say but there are two words in particular he knows will reach her.]

I want to be the one who mends that broken heart of yours...

Edited 2024-09-02 07:25 (UTC)

[ The last time anyone ever held the princess and stroked her hair like this, she was sixteen years old. She had run to Urbosa's side after yet another quarrel with Link (or, more accurately, at Link) and, behind the safety of a closed door, cried out her frustrations on the Chief's lap. Urbosa spoke soothing words and stroked her hair until Zelda's sobs tapered off and she was finally calm. It was okay to allow herself to be weak with Urbosa. The princess knew she was safe with Urbosa.

She finds herself feeling that same sense of safety with Darin.

Although Zelda feels droplets of something falling upon her head, she doesn't immediately register what they are. It's not until she feels his hand beneath her chin, beckoning her to look up at him once more, that she realizes what she felt.

Tears. His cheeks are streaked with tears, glistening in the light of the moon shining in through her bedroom window. Zelda's heart wrenches at the sight, so painfully she nearly clutches her chest with her hand. He never knew Sonia; he has no reason to grieve her loss. But that's not the source of his tears, and she knows it. Zelda is. It is her grief that has moved him to tears.

And yet, in spite of that sadness, he smiles. Not one of those fake things he wears whenever he's trying to keep her at arm's length. No, this is real, honest, and Zelda can feel her heart-- her poor, aching heart, cleaved in two by a monster-- flood with warmth at the sight.

He wants to be the one to mend her broken heart. Indeed, those two words reach her. He wants to care for her, to support her, to tend to her when she is weak...

(Can she want to do the same for him? Would he ever permit her to try?) ]

There is no one better I would trust to try.

[His heart leaps into his throat and he can scarcely believe her words. No one better? That certainly was a lofty statement. Darin has no doubt that Zelda has surrounded herself with people so much more capable than he. People that he wants to learn about. To see them through the princess's eyes.]

[He wants...]

[A short laugh escapes his lips at the thought. When the hell did he start wanting things like that? Maybe it was because of those eyes that see so easily through his facades— his bravado and anger. She truly sees him for who he is. Who he wants to be.]

[And that just stokes the fire in his heart to the point where the tears start to fall in greater abundance to match hers. He's crying out of shared loss and empathy.]

{Gods to think he almost left this behind.]

I...I want to to do better than try. I want to prove it can be done.

[His hand moves from her chin back to her cheek so that he can lean forward and touch his forehead to hers. Darin can't remember the last time he cried but in this sanctuary he won't allow anymore secrets between them.]

I want...I want to show you a world free of nightmares...

I want to be worthy of your praise...

[For two people who have known so much loss, who have always put the world before themselves, to be able to share their wants with another is truly freeing.]

Edited 2024-09-02 20:46 (UTC)

[ The way Darin smiles at her through his tears-- her tears, her grief, that he somehow feels as acutely as she-- it makes her heart swell in her chest, filling her with the overwhelming urge to embrace him. Apparently, his empathy picks up on that too, because he leans in at the same time that thought passes through her mind and presses his forehead against hers.

Eyes falling closed, Zelda slips her arms over his shoulders and links them lightly behind his neck. Oh how she wishes she could convince him that he is already worth her praise. How she wishes he would trust her when she says that, that he would trust all of the kindnesses she wants to share with him, instead of trying to deny that he deserves them.

She has so many wants. ]

I want you to believe me when I tell you that you are already worthy of my praise.

I want you to understand, with your whole heart, that you are not a monster.

And if you cannot, I want to spend every day, every hour, until you believe me, proving to you that you are not.

[That lump in his throat swells until the sounds coming from his lips are a mixture of sobs and laughter.]

[He throws his arms around her waist and reels her into a proper hug. One where they can nuzzle cheek to cheek and bury their faces in each other's neck and hair.]

[He doesn't believe she likes this as much as he does. He's large and rough— calloused and worn. But he believes that she'd accept him regardless. A feeling that fills him with equal parts honor and dread.]

I want to give you a place to be free...

I want...I want to spend every minute giving you everything you've had stolen from you...

[His voice is a whisper but his heart is pounding. Somehow, despite the roaring flame of his heart, Zelda is the warmest thing in the room to him.]

[Who knew that crying could feel so liberating?]

[ Whether he intends it or not, Darin effortlessly pulls Zelda from her chair and onto the bed as he embraces her. The pure emotion she hears from him, the soft sobs and softer laughter, fill her heart so much it feels like it could burst. Zelda's hold on him shifts, one hand traveling up the back of his neck and into his hair. She presses her cheek to his, both damp with the princess's grief. His skin is so hot to the touch, as though he is still burning with fever, but she doesn't draw back. There's nothing unpleasant about his heat. ]

I want to give you everything you've been denied all your life.

I want to make this world your home.

[ Holding each other like this, with all their emotions raw and exposed for the other to plainly see, makes her feel like she did on the day Link freed her from the seal. For the first time in one hundred years, she looked upon him with her own two eyes. She could feel her own senses and emotions with such intensity that it overwhelmed her. She fell into Link's arms and they pulled each other into an embrace just like this. All those overwhelming feelings erupted from her, relief and joy and anguish all pouring out of her in a mess of sobs mixed with laughs.

In the short time she has known Darin, Zelda has come to cherish him deeply-- as deeply as she cherishes Link, Sonia and Rauru, the Champions, her father. ]

I... I want you to live. [ She squeezes him tighter. ] If I am only allowed to want one thing, I want you to live.

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