escordvi | << september: maiden voyage >>

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<< september: maiden voyage >>

Welcome to our Maiden Voyage log for the game! Because the grand opening is a bit different from how things will normally flow, the log is more like an event log with the MANTA Board included at the bottom. The focus of the log will be everyone getting a first taste of the home base for each armada, but not before having a farewell celebration in Eltrut to the new initiates! Since it is a little beefy, we've included navigation links to help jump between sections.

Players are welcome to use the MANTA Board as additional prompts in the log, or create your own open logs for them. There is no wrong or right way, whatever is most convenient for you.

If you have any questions about the log, comment here. If you have questions about the game in general, please comment to the Game Info.

TOPLEVEL DIRECTORY (Updated September 13)

ELTRUT: FAREWELL SENDOFF

It's been about a week or so since the newest batch of riftfarers arrived, and now the ships are ready to take them to their native armada base. But before everyone goes their separate ways, a special "sendoff" is held for the new initiates. Hosted by older, veteran riftfarers and their respective armada affiliation, two major competitions are held. One is to promote partnership between the armadas, the other is for their competitiveness.

A fan favorite for a number of years now, Legends of the Gutsy Ultimate Sailor Warrior Competition is a massive two-person obstacle course that has a whole suite of challenges to test sailor's physical and mental resolve…and teamwork. The only real rule is each pair needs one Corsair and one Paladin, which can be made voluntarily or randomly. Along with crossing a pool via spinning logs, swinging and climbing ropes, and plummeting down ziplines, there are a few notable obstacles teams will need to get through.

🚪 Steering a giant ship's wheel in order to lift the door to the next obstacle. Both partners need to take turns, one spinning it upwards and the other continuing down.
🦑 They must piece together the three parts of the Silver Squid Statue, fitting each piece properly and vertically together (have to hear the snap to ensure the pieces connected!) and then placed it into a hole in a door to move on.
⛰️ The final obstacle is called Mount Grog, where the team must climb to the peak of this hill of craggy stone. While there are footholes aplenty, there are also steam vents, "landslides" of small boulder-shaped pillows, and warm "lava" of red-dyed ale, making the terrain slippery and sticky! Mind the steam and ale, they are made of strong liquor and may make those with low tolerance a bit…intoxicated.
🐱‍👤 While some are free to spectate and cheer in the audience, others may volunteer to try and sabotage the rest of the competition by chucking wilted produce, or if you're really lucky, the showrunners will pull you from the audience to hit switches to change up the layout of the map mid-race!

The second event is Capture the Flag and takes place along a long stretch of beach using the remains of two retired ships on either end: one with each of the three masts flying a red flag, the other with three blue flags. Each player will have a small flag of their armada colors attached to a belt on their waist, along with a few very full colored water balloons. The goal is to steal as many of the other team's flags as possible and bring them back to their ship before the hourglass runs out. The only rule is no magic allowed! Have to use good ol' wit and grit. All magic will be suppressed and all weapons taken/forced to be left behind.

💧 Everyone is armed with water balloons of their respective team color. Use them to pelt your opponents and get that flag!
🚩 Some may want to try and score big by capturing one of the ship's flags. But it won't be easy. There will be a "crew" defending their ships and will have cannons filled with giant water balloons, sticky nets, and life preserver rings to deploy against attackers. They can also use the rings to quickly grab their own teammates and pull them to safety.
⛓ There is a jail that caught opponents can be taken to right next to the ship. Either escape, help a caught teammate, or defend it!

After another night of reveling in various taverns (and likely getting into more bar fights), everyone will set sail the following morning, with or without the hangovers. Everyone should be prepared to pitch in their weight, as during the trip, they will learn how to be a deckhand, learning the literal ropes of pitching sails, swabbing decks, and working the galley. There could be other areas they might have access to if they have the skill for it. They will also have a chance to practice their magic. Don't worry, the ships are fitted with special protection that even a stray spell won't cause too much damage (though if it does, they better be prepared to repair and clean it up). And since it will take a few days to get to their respective leviathans, everyone should remember their temporary cabin number. Some may even have roommates.

But the number one rule for both ships is no fighting between members. Save it for when they're back on shore!

ELAH: PALADIN BASE

Compared to the bright colors and bustle of Eltrut, Elah is much more refined and orderly, especially the capital city of Baleen. Tall, sturdy buildings of polished marble and white coral with accents of gold and mother-of-pearl, set in tiered, orderly rings of sandstone-cobbled streets organized by purpose and class. The higher it is, the more affluent, with the Chambers of Council seated at its highest point. Yet there is very little to no poverty, as the citizens are diligent in keeping everything clean and everyone taken care of. That isn't to say there aren't "dirty" parts of the city…but for the most part it's a prosperous, bustling city that takes pride not only in its Paladin force, but in the arts and pursuit of higher education and research. High above one may see gondolas seemingly sailing in the air, but they are just riding the "breath streams'' of Elah that connect to the three blowholes spiracles lining the leviathan's back. In the distant north, one may even catch a glimpse of the main blowhole spiracle releasing a huge stream of water. Access is currently under construction, but new riftfarers will be able to access it soon.

At the center is the city's pride and joy: the Plaza Fontea. Around the outer rim are daily markets and performers to help cultivate the arts and casual business, and there are a number of gardens and ponds for visitors to relax and enjoy. And at its center is a grand mosaic in the great whale's image with a series of "water spouts" that shoot water up through the ground, sometimes to music. However, something is amiss. Without warning, the water is turning different colors and making fart noises. While anyone who might know some engineering is free to help those beneath the fountain to try and figure out what happened and repair it, others can try and catch the culprits who pulled this deplorable prank (hint, bunch of Corsairs, of course).

At the Nodding Kettle, there are some special items that new Paladins can receive. These items are also available on the Rewards Shop, but new members can choose one for free. These items are also special in that they will start at a basic level, but can be upgraded and refined for better effects (for a fee).

🔪 Dowsing Blade: Lvl 1. A short sword that once fully upgraded can find special treasures and precious metals. At level 1, it will only find junk, but who knows? One man's trash is another man's treasure. And rusted metal can still hurt in a fight—
🫧 Bubble Shield: Lvl 1. A shield that will grow in size and strength once fully upgraded and provide protection in the form of a dome. At level 1, it creates a small bubble that covers a small area next to the user and can only take a few hits before it pops.
🔦 Wayfinder Torch: Lvl 1. A torch that burns brighter and can illuminate and find any path to a designated location or exit once fully upgraded. At level 1, it can only illuminate up to a few feet and must be charged with magic to continue.

The educational district is one of the many prides and joys of Elah, and especially the block containing the sprawling, U-shaped Archives framing the massive, gold-framed glass dome of the Conservatory. The core of the Archives is a blocky building of very weathered marble, with two longer and more slender wings; nearly every room inside is dedicated to some sort of specialized library, lecture hall, laboratory, or archaeological restoration room. The Conservatory, meanwhile, is teeming with the rarest of plants, flocks of birds, skittering reptiles, and even small artificial tide pools hosting reef-dwelling fauna and small schools of fish. As new members explore the complex, they may find the new items will come in handy for their tasks.

📖 There's been intel of Corsairs targeting the Archives for their next heist, especially the special collection in the library. Newer Paladins will be asked to guard the library in shifts and keep an eye out for anyone suspicious.
🦤 Oh no, Angus the Dodo has escaped the conservatory again! Capture him and bring him back unharmed. Thankfully he's peaceful and not very smart, but he is easily startled and surprisingly fast. He's a glutton for fruit, nuts, and seeds, and he's infamous for stealing fancy hats, especially if they have feathers on them.
🏰 Reports have come in of a nearby island with ruins of an ancient castle standing on them. Venture out, document the site, and retrieve any artifacts for proper cataloging at the Archives before the Corsairs break or steal anything important.

NOGARD: CORSAIR BASE

While Eltrut and Elah both have relatively smooth surfaces to build on, Nogard's back is covered in jutting ridges and spines. Between the uneven terrain, the transformation between Nogard's living sea form and skeletal land form, and the demon-ridden forest, structures here focus much more on defense and ease of repair or relocation as needed than on matching a set theme. Buildings in Fang are made from a mishmash of old metal, driftwood, and bone, but are often decorated with bright murals and graffiti, drapes of colorful fabrics, and intricate sea glass creations. Taverns and pubs can be found on nearly every corner, loud music and cheers and more than occasionally the sounds of a brawl pouring out from about noon to the wee hours of the morning.

Currently Nogard has settled on a remote island, its skeletal structure nestled deep within the island's cove, creating a natural barrier that will only allow Corsair ships in and out. They will be there for a while, taking advantage of the beasts that inhabit the island and provide valuable materials to be sold. But of course it can get boring, so it's not surprising to see the more "reckless" ziplining from one curved rib to another high above the city. There are also some makeshift fighting arenas for members to test their strength. Those who prefer to actually learn about Nogard's current settlement set out to canvas and explore the island, hoping to find some other ruins or resources that could be useful.

At the Leviathan's Maw, there are some special items that new Corsairs can receive. These items are also available on the Rewards Shop, but new members can choose one for free. These items are also special in that they will start at a basic level, but can be upgraded and refined for better effects (for a fee).

🧥 Camouflage Cloak: Lvl 1. A cloak that once upgraded will allow the wearer to shift and blend into their surroundings. At level 1, it's a bit ratty looking and only useful if hiding in shadows. Even then it's only for a few seconds, but better than none.
🔁 Ring of Returning: Lvl 1. A ring that once upgraded will allow the wearer to return to a specific location upon activation. At level 1, it can only be used once per day and returns you to a public space.
🔀 Ring of Evasion: Lvl 1. A ring that once upgraded will allow the wearer to have increased movement speed and dodging ability. At level 1, it is only effective in avoiding small objects and getting through crowds easier. Not useful for combat until upgraded.

While there are some "respectable" stores and merchants around Nogard, the Black Market is what the city of Fang is best known for. And as part of their initiation, new members are sent to the literal underbelly of the leviathan's skeletal remains where the Black Market exists. Those new free items offered by the Leviathan's Maw may be useful…

💍 Several sellers have put up requests for certain "special rare items" to help restock their wares, but these items are "special" and "rare" for a reason. From needing to kill monsters on the island Nogard has settled on and harvesting for certain materials, to stealing from certain ships and rich houses in Elah (oops).
🏰 On a certain island, there are some castle ruins that has been recently discovered and there are some artifacts and relics that could catch a hefty price if brought back. Just ignore the Paladins who may be excavating…and perhaps take their finds.
📦 Some merchants have special wares that need to be delivered to their clients all over Nogard and on some neighboring islands. Of course, there are many others who might try to steal it…whatever is inside it. Wait—did the box just shake? What, protect the package and deliver it safely!

MANTA BOARD

As mentioned above, usually the Quest Board will be posted separately as we won't normally have logs like these. But for everyone's convenience, we've included it here for additional prompts. Players can either use the quest board here in their toplevels, or create their own open log for them if they prefer to keep it separate and spread things out more.

GENERAL

PALADINS

CORSAIRS

BOUNTIES

𝕊ℙ𝔼ℂ𝕀𝔸𝕃𝕊

» GENERAL (4pts)

Dockside Repairs

Reward: 100 dubloons and a serving of cinnamon sugar grog for each day of hard work.

A recent tempestuous storm wreaked havoc upon Eltrut’s main port, leaving many of its docks in dire need of repair.

We are seeking dedicated workers to lend a helping hand in restoring the damaged docks. We encourage those with specialized abilities in carpentry, construction, or any related field (magic, physical or otherwise) to join in the collective effort to repair the docks as soon as possible.

As we are not sure how many newcomers we will have in the future we must restore the port to its former glory, ensuring it serves as a steadfast foundation for our maritime activities! Please help out!

Seahorse Whisperers

Reward: 100 dubloons and a seahorse charm that allows you to bond with gentle sea creatures easily. Doesn’t appear to work well on the angry ones.

Atnam Island has been graced with the arrival of a spirited new batch of young seahorses.

These magnificent creatures are wild and energetic and difficult to tame. We are seeking daring individuals who are up to the challenge of calming and training these giant temperamental seahorses to become reliable and majestic mounts in the water.

Those who dare to embark on this training journey will be rewarded for their efforts. Alongside the profound satisfaction of witnessing the growth and development of these magnificent creatures, you will receive a special token of appreciation for your successful training.

Caviar Conundrum

Reward: 100 dubloons and one tin of orange lanternfish caviar. The caviar itself is said to induce vivid lucid dreams.

A fresh shipment of rare live orange lanternfish has arrived.

There are barrels of them ready to be harvested for their delicious caviar. We are looking for able hands to help collect the fish eggs from this rare fish. You’ll be equipped with the buckets and scoops needed.

However, be forewarned, for these fish are highly territorial and possess a potent electrical bite. Slowly navigating their space and avoiding their electrifying defences will require careful strategy and patience. The tales caution that even a single bite from these remarkable creatures can induce paralysis lasting an hour.

Woody Rarities

Reward: 100 dubloons and a piece of crystal wood that faintly glows when it is about to rain.

A cluster of ancient trees has piqued curiosity, as they appear to defy nature's laws by remaining dry during rainfall.

This phenomenon has caught the attention of keen observers, and we now seek crafty individuals to investigate further.

Venture to the tops of hills or mountains on Eltrut Island and examine these remarkable trees, and gather samples of their purportedly waterproof bark and wood for thorough testing. If proven true, this extraordinary property could revolutionize shipbuilding techniques and open new horizons for maritime exploration.

Bottle Voyage!

Reward: Probably some bad advice. Or a love letter. Or maybe a new friend?

Have you heard of messages in a bottle?

Embrace the sea's powerful enchantment! Pen a heartfelt letter, place it in a glass bottle and release it into the ocean's waves to see what happens.

Rumour has it that within three days, the bottle will return to you with a reply. Discover personal advice, fortunes, or messages from far away. Perhaps even find a lifelong pen pal through this method! Unleash your heartfelt words into the water and let the sea work its wonders!

Results may vary. (Optional: For added flavour attempt posting your bottle message to a random character's inbox.)

» PALADINS (4pts)

Paws of Valor

Reward: A voucher for a free dagger at The Nodding Kettle: Blacksmith and Wares.

Hello, aspiring recruits! We are in need of your assistance to gather iron ore at the local mines, a vital resource for crafting cannonballs to fortify the armada. Although the task at hand may be arduous, it is of utmost importance!

However, we must provide one gentle warning. One of our captains recently lost his pet wildcat, Whiskerbeard, and she has been left to roam freely. Whiskerbeard has a mischievous streak and enjoys playing pranks on new recruits. While she may pose a playful challenge during your ore collection, we trust that you young and agile newcomers will find ways to work around her more violent antics. Please do not harm her or your coin will be cut in half for an entire month!

Five Finger Discount-inued

Reward: The sheer satisfaction of doing the right thing.

Reports have emerged of pickpockets and thieves falling victim to a frustrated shop owner–turned–vigilante, resulting in severed fingers and a growing stain on the Paladin’s reputation for maintaining order among the various port marketplaces.

In order to address this issue and uphold the principles of justice, we need your expertise to delve into the local shops and uncover the truth behind these vigilante actions. It is crucial to identify the shop owner responsible as well as apprehend any theives and restore a sense of balance and fairness to the markets.

However, it is essential to approach this investigation with a focus on fairness and adherence to the law. Our aim is to ensure a just and lawful resolution, and a few fewer fingers being cut off, including yours.

Chasing Tuna Titans

Reward: A casket of fine wine. The bigger the fish, the bigger the casket.

The recent influx of newcomers has led to an increased demand for foodstuffs, placing a strain on our hardworking fishermen. To aid them in meeting these demands, the fishermen have requested assistance from the Paladin's vessels to catch a fresh supply of large tuna fish until new fishermen can be trained.

Join the fishing ships in procuring a bountiful supply of giant tuna fish. Be prepared for the challenge, for these magnificent creatures can grow to sizes ranging from sixty pounds to a staggering four hundred pounds. Good luck reeling them in!

» CORSAIRS (4pts)

Traded Secrets

Reward: A recipe for a dubious-looking soup made to be highly addictive and whatever else you steal from the ship.

There is a popular merchant ship that sells soup out of its main deck that is travelling the seas lately. Its tantalising flavours have ignited such fervent desire that people are willing to engage in battles and even sink ships to secure a coveted bowl. And you’ll be damned if you don’t get a bowl of it before it’s all gone! Find the secrets behind the renowned travelling ship's irresistibly delectable soup!

Surely, there has to be a trick to it. Begin by infiltrating the merchant’s ship, whether by legitimate means or through becoming a discreet passenger and find out what that secret ingredient is. What makes this soup so tantalising that people are willing to give someone a black eye to get it. Is it a frog's legs? Eye of newt? Some kind of illegal drug? Paprika?

Unconventional Couture

Reward: A silk dress of your choice and a pocket gun that can be concealed in a boot.

A renowned mistress from the lantern light district in Naughtilust seeks diverse bodies to showcase her exquisite collection of rare silks and gowns. Don’t worry, she disregards conventional standards and welcomes individuals of any body type or gender, recognizing the beauty in diversity. The more types the better, actually!

However, it is imperative to maintain utmost discretion, as these precious garments were acquired through unconventional means (they were stolen). This gathering is intended for a select group of haughty guests who will appreciate the opulence and allure of these clandestine treasures. So keep it hush-hush! There are dubloons to be squeezed!

Pickpocketing Practice

Reward: A lesson learned for every pocket picked.

With the influx of new scallywags on our shores, the Corsair ships have taken it upon themselves to impart their expertise in the art of pickpocketing. If you're ready to master the craft and enhance your acting, lying, and sleight-of-hand skills, then step forward and join their pickpocketing seminars!

Under the guidance of experienced Corsairs, you'll learn the tricks of the trade, honing your abilities to make a quick dubloon when navigating crowded streets or lively gatherings.

Remember, with great power comes great responsibility. As you venture out to test your newfound skills, exercise caution and subtlety. A successful pickpocket knows the importance of being undetected. The Corsairs will not come to your aid should you find yourself hanging around in the gallows. Or losing a few fingers.

» BOUNTIES (6pts)

Giga Mantis Shrimp

Reward: 500 dubloons.

Said to be as large as a horse with a sting as powerful as a hundred stinging jellyfish. This creature has somehow grown larger than most other mantis shrimp and it has been hunting down and eating the heads of male prey. Find this creature in the ocean and kill it before it hunts and eats more innocent sailors.

Read More.

✦ Size: Medium
✦ Type: Sea creature
✦ Strengths: Powerful pincers, Swift swimmer, Carnivorous, Stinging spines
✦ Weaknesses: Lightning, Sharp weapons, Piercing weapons

Horned Dolphin

Reward: 1000 dubloons. An extra 500 dubloons for the horn.

A rare dolphin with a strange magical glowing horn has been sighted in the ocean. Although some of the rumours are saying that the dolphin is merely a lost narwhal. It seems to only appear when the weather is foggy which makes it particularly difficult to find. Find it and record proof of its existence or kill it and farm the horn for an extra bounty.

Read More.

✦ Size: Large
✦ Type: Sea creature
✦ Strengths: Light magic, Swift swimmer, Omnivourous, Peaceful
✦ Weaknesses: Wind magic, Darkness magic, Blunt weapons

» SPECIALS (12pts)

None

Reward: None

No special quests at this time.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He is trying so damn hard, but she's the only one who can make his face crumple so fast at the sight of her tears. Makes his chest tighten that he just wants to run over there and wrap her in his arms, take her away from everything.

Yet the only thing that's stopping him is the fact that he doesn't have that right anymore. Doesn't have that right to do what he used to.

No...he has to earn it all over again. Work it. And as much as he wants to hasten his steps, he forces himself to stay slow. Forces himself to try and keep his voice steady... Even if she might still hear the slight tremble in it.]

I don't care.

[He wants to shout this at her, but he manages to keep it just a clear if strained voice.]

Garuda, queen, peasant, noble, strong, weak—I don't care. None of it. Never did.

[As he speaks, he slowly closes that distance.]

And—

[It's here his voice tightens. Here that he's now in front of her, his eyes swimming with that intense emotion that is so hard to bear. So overwhelming that he only barely manages to keep it in check.]

—you're alive right now.

[They both are.]

If this is the only place we can be...the only way I can have you...

[His hand trembles as he carefully places a hand on her cheek, feeling her warmth before his thumb gently brushes away the trail of tears—one not made of her blood this time—and goes to her chin to tilt her face up to him. So he can really look at the expression she's wearing.

So she can see his.]

Then aye. I'll take you just like this.

[Broken. A mess.

His mess. The one he made.]

Edited 2023-10-01 03:36 (UTC)

[She can't bring herself to look at him, even as she hears him approach, but she can hear it in his voice as clearly as she can hear the wind. She can feel the sincerity of his words, of his declaration that continues to terrify her. Scares her more than losing Garuda, than King Barnabas, and more than anything that this world could ever hope to do.

His kindness, and the open freedom that comes with what he has to offer her... Should she fall into it, who would catch her? Would he...? When she could no longer use her wings, broken and bruised and torn apart, every feather plucked from her back, would his arms still be there?

Whatever air remains in her lungs leaves them when his finger reaches her, and she forgets to breathe under the brush of it on her cheek, so warm... A comfort that she had known and sought out so much and so often, once upon a time, and a comfort that she once more wants to lean into, to take all for herself, even if she is undeserving of it.

Can't she just be a little selfish, just this once?

Can't she let herself believe in his promises, even if tomorrow may come and it all changes?

"I'll take you like this."

Her hands, shaking as much as his, reach up to him, her fingers grazing lightly over his bared chest, gaze following them as she lets herself feel...

Lets herself feel something real for the first time in a long time.]

You shouldn't.

[He can't.

Not like this.

She won't let him. First, she must pick up all of these scattered pieces and put herself back together. Somehow.

Even still, she can't bring herself to pull away from his heat just yet. Not when the rest of the world feels so cold right now, as her fingers now rove up his shoulders, her face twisting with the emotion that threatens to spill over that she continues to try so damn hard to hide.]

[For a moment he tenses, thinking she'll push him away. It would be something she had a right to do, so he wouldn't really be able to fight back, but... A part of him hoped that she would let him stay.

Let him in.

He's been trying to pull and pull and pull, and he knows now that while he needs to, he needs to be more careful. So she'll feel that slight bit of tension when she first touches him before it relaxes when she doesn't push him back. Feel how his breath wavers at her words as he continues to look down at her.

Searching.]

Well we both know how I am about following "should"'s.

[Which is not good at all.

He does know she has her pride, but he just wants her to know that he really would take her, broken pieces and all. That she doesn't have to be perfect.]

[She feels that tension and then the release of it that follows beneath her fingertips, feathery light as they remain, but it doesn't deter her. It only makes something hot and heavy settle into her chest—a desire that slowly unravels her, because as much as she wants to ignore it for her own sake, she can't. Not with him here, right in front of her, so close and yet never further out of her reach.

It's then when he'll feel her nails dig into the skin of his shoulders, trembling uncontrollably in her fight to will it away.]

I can't, Cidolfus...

[Fear ignites in her eyes, because every goddamn time she tries to give in, there is that other chain that stops her and wrenches her back. Whether it is Barnabas or her by her own hands, they are there, always pulling, always keeping her in place.

No matter how badly she wants to, it isn't a question of that. It never was.]

I have always wanted...

[No.]

I need you, but...

[That sob that she's been fighting finally wrestles itself free from her grasp, and she hunches over, her head having nowhere to go but to fall against his chest as her nails dig and dig, raking over him when she fears she might further slip away into whatever this is.]

[He sees that fear, and again his resolve wavers. How he so badly wants to chase those fears away, to once again take her so far, far away. To let her heal.

...Yet he's also hurting her, so it's such a terrible conflicting, painful feeling.

Still, he's come this far, and if he's anything he's stubborn.

So when her head falls against his chest, as her nails dig in deep, she'll feel his arms wrap around her—tightly. Feels him hug her close as his face lowers to the top of her head, eyes closed tight as he releases a shaky breath.]

...I know.

[His voice is muffled, both by her hair and by his own emotions as he continues to try very hard to not waver anymore than he has.]

It's a lot, I know. But like I said—I'll wait.

[His hand gently strokes her back, right where he always has. Right over her shoulders, down her spine, circling around to try and soothe her.]

I won't leave you. [There's more pain and regret in his voice as squeezes her tighter.] Not this time.

[As long as she wants him, needs him—he'll fight for her. Fight for what he should have done long ago.]

[She wants to scream so, so badly. Wants to scream and shove him away, wants to remind him of everything that he had left her with when he disappeared. She wants to remind him of everything they used to have and hate him for how much time they have lost, how much time she has wasted waiting for him, how many tears she has cried for him only for her wishes to fall upon deaf ears. She wants him to leave her and wants him to stay. To hold her, and to push him away if only to make it easier for her to leave him.

And maybe that night, he had... but here she is again, clawing her way back to him in some form, her heart trying to tear away the confines of her chest because she is too fucking scared, too fucking stubborn, and too fucking proud to let it do what it wants.

Once more, she's pulled in two different directions. Two different voices whispering in her ears, Cid in one, Barnabas in the other, the latter trying to tell her so many different things. He asks whose arms it was that had taken her when she felt angry and betrayed and left behind, whose lips had soothed her on those nights when all she could think about was him. And then, now, how she could lure him in, bring him to her king's side...

But it drowns out so quickly when Cid whispers into her ears, so determined and resolute and stubborn as he always is. So virtuous and honourable. So goddamn kind that it angers that part of her that still hates him.]

... And if you do?

[Because she cannot bring herself to believe him wholly and completely. Not yet.]

If you do, what then?

[What if, when that day comes when she can finally run to him, he is no longer there?]

Not even you can wait forever.

Then I just won't make you take that long.

[Again that firmness in his voice...one that hides the doubts that do still swim somewhere beneath. Of what if she ends up turning her back. Ends up choosing a different path again.

Ends up rejecting him.

Because what she says is true—he can't wait forever. Even he has only so much patience.]

I said I'd wait, but that doesn't mean I'm just going to sit idly by.

[Her hands move from his shoulders down to his chest again, and there, she lets a fist press firmly against it, as if she means to push him away, but she won't as she brings her eyes back up to meet his. Slowly.

She knows that he is not the type of person who could sit back, but if only he hadn't when it mattered.

Which is why she finds herself asking—]

... And what could you even do?

[To help her. To save her.]

[Great question. One he knows could either make or break them right now.]

...I don't know.

[He answers honestly, but he'll remove one his arms from around her to rise up and place his hand over hers over his chest.]

Learn you all over again? Annoy the hell out of you until you go out for a drink with me?

[His fingers squeeze over hers before he takes them to raise them to his lips.]

Kill whoever gets in my way?

[That's some heavy implication there, a slight, dangerous flicker in his eyes as his voice drops before he brushes his lips over her knuckles.]

Whatever it takes, I'll do it.

[Whatever words of protest and defiance she might have uttered or tried to bark back at him die in her throat the moment he lifts her hand to his lips. The gesture is such a delicate and intimate one that she freezes, or everything else stills around them—she doesn't know which, but she watches as they come so very close to, and her heart swells in her chest, forcing a soft, wavering breath out of her.

Why must she be so weak? Why must he be the one to shatter her will, her pride, her defenses? Everything about who she tries to be lest she fall into another deeper, darker pit of despair... why is it him of all people who she both wants to protect herself from and who can make it all disappear?

She despises it. Despises him so, so much.

But more than that, his words make her knees buckle. She can hear the implication as clearly as he intends for her to hear it, and her eyes snap open to catch that gleam in his eye...

And her heart skips several beats, if not more, though this time, not out of selfish passion, but out of fear, and he'll feel her fingers tense under his grip when she wrestles with the urge to suddenly pull back.]

Cidolfus, don't... Annoy me all you like, but don't.

[Were this even a few weeks ago, before they entered this world, before her death, those words would have pissed him off. Would have made the worst thoughts bubble forth, the hurt dig in deeper.

But now he knows the truth.

Now he knows that "loyalty" she bears for Barnabas is as thin as paper, trembling just above a knife's edge. He does not doubt that she may still hold true loyalty and gratefulness for what he's done, but he knows that fear is now predomninant.

And now that fear is carrying over to what might happen to him. Fear of what he might do and the likely outcome.

So his fingers tighten over hers, as if to quash that tension, to break it as he suddenly yanks her hand up to pull her upwards towards him, his own head lowering to meet hers.

And yet, their lips fall woefully short. So close they can feel each other's breath. So close that already his lips occasionally lightly brush against hers. So close he can already taste the salt of the sea from the wind that's blown around them. So close...]

Then convince me not to.

[And it's true—a part of it is because she still bears a loyalty to her king. Still loves him in a way that one could love only a king who had taken her in, gave her a name, gave her life a meaning and a purpose.

But it is also true that she has always feared him, even more so now than she ever has before, and that fear had only come to light when she'd lost Garuda. She always knew what he might do to those who served no purpose, but until it affected her, she could easily turn a blind eye to it.

And now, he continues to keep her chained to him, dangling that fear over her head, whether he realizes it or not. Benedikta and Cid both know what he is capable of, what he could do them both with the mere flick of his blade, perhaps better than anyone else... and that is what is keeping her at his side, truly. To ensure that he does not destroy the one place that Benedikta has left, or the one person...

...

The one person who, as he pulls her closer, strikes away every lingering thought of Barnabas until all that remains is him. The tragically soft brush of his breath over hers, the mere inches that remain now between their lips feeling like a wide rift that stands between them...

A rift that she only need step over to reach him...

Just this once.

Just this once, she will spread her wings and leap and pray that he will be there to catch her on the other side.

With one last hot, quivering breath, Benedikta gives them no other choice.

If this will convince him not to do what she knows he wants to, then she will do it. If this will keep him safe from the edge of Barnabas's blade, then so be it.

Even if it will hurt them both in the end because no matter how much she wishes she could hate him, a world in which she can neither love him nor hate him is a world she does not want to be a part of.

So she closes that space between them and her lips go crashing into his like a violent riptide that means to pull him back with her.]

[And the moment she does, he meets back with as much force, like a storm that roars in, ready to engulf everything in its wake.

The hand that had held hers drops so that he can cup her face, his touch firm but holding that same gentleness he's always had. That tenderness, that love—that desperation to keep her to him for as long as he can. For as much as he's allowing himself to drown in this, to let her sweep him in as much as he's pulling her back, he knows it won't last forever.

That this is yet once again fueled by their emotions, their twisted need for the other.

But he doesn't care.

Now that it's come to this, he'll take whatever he can. It's pathetic and desperate, he knows, but that's just what he is when he's with her. So desperate to have her back. To pull her out.

To do what he couldn't before.

To make up for all the wrong and hurt he inflicted on her.

So he won't be the first to pull back. Instead his arm will wrap her more tightly to him as he hunts for her lips, her tongue, her taste. Anything he can have her of her now.

And while this is just as rough and desperate as the last time, this kiss is different. This isn't one driven by anger or impatience. No, it is one filled with his true feelings, the true depth of how much he really wants to take her back. Of his renewed determination that had been floundering. Of his fears that he still may only be bringing her hurt in the end.

Of how much he still loves her, even after all this. Even after everything. Even after they came to the cusp of destroying one another completely. Even after they already destroyed each other once already.

How much he's still a goddamn fucking fool for her.]

Edited 2023-10-01 07:47 (UTC)

[Even now, he still finds a way to destroy her. Finds a way to wreck everything that she's built, everything that she continues to rebuild as they do this song and dance, this push and pull with one another. She wishes that she could say that this is healing her—that, despite drowning in the depth of those feelings he pours into the kiss, and despite diving in there herself, it all hurts more than it heals because she knows that once they let go, everything will fall back to where it should be. Where the universe wants them...

A place where she cannot have him, and he cannot have her. A place where neither deserves the other. To a place where the world will find ways to keep them apart, and where she will find even more ways to keep them apart, that fear too rooted in her now to allow her otherwise.

Which is why, right now, in this brief respite away from that world, she will take what he has to offer her.

She will be selfish, and though still afraid and hurt, she hunts for his lips, craves his taste just as much as he does hers.

Her own hands splayed across his chest, her palms are warm as she seeks out the feel of his skin, to drink up every part of him that she can before she ends it. He'll feel her hesitation still, even as she wraps her arms around him when her knees grow weak, her body wanting to give in so much and melt into the heat of his that he wraps around her.

For her, it is a kiss born out of her desperation. A need for comfort and solace—a kind that she has only ever found in him in spite of her years searching for and seeking it. A need for love—his love—that she has craved for so long.

The love that has turned her into the mess that she is.

Which is why, in the moments before it's over, she grows more frantic, pressing herself to him more firmly, both lips and body bending to mold to his. It's aggressive and demanding, drawing upon every part of Cidolfus that she can take, every part of him that she still loves so much—too much that she can't fucking stand it.

But it's there, and it is just as real, just as deep, just as powerful as it always has been, leaving only to come back with a vengeance and a strength that only he could have.

And when she finally does break free, her lips swollen, her chest rising to keep up with her heart, her eyes thick and honeyed with the desire that he's breathed into her, it will be with a hand pressed firmly to his chest.]

...Cidolfus...

[His name spills out of her in a whisper, strained and aching, the hurt still clear as ever in her voice, like she is begging him to continue, to stop, to stay, to leave her...

Because fuck if she doesn't know what she wants anymore.

And should he seek her out again, her lips will dip away.]

Do not think that this changes anything.

[As if sensing she's about to pull away when she becomes more aggressive, he returns in kind. As if trying to grasp at those frayed tethers, desperate to keep any hold before they slip through his fingers again. As if knowing that once this over, they will be back on their side of this rift that keeps them apart.

But can't he at least take some solace that for once, when they did manage to breach it, that they were more honest and true to each other than they have in the past?

That for once, this broken bridge has started to mend just a little bit?

Maybe it's a fool's hope, but if he's already the fool, what other kind can he have?

So yes, he will chase her when she pulls away, the sound of his name more painful than he ever imagined. Yet while it is also as painful and disappointing when she dips away, he won't fault her. Instead, he just looks down at her before pressing his lips to the top of her head. Very gently, very light, but there. A small reminder for her of how he still cares. Still wants her.

And understands.]

I know.

[And it's only then that he also pulls away, but only a little bit. Only enough so that he can look down at her so he can fully see her, as if wanting to imprint this into his memory to remind himself of the truth when she eventually starts throwing up those walls and acts up again. To remind himself... There is a chance.]

And I won't push you to give more than you can...

[He gently brushes his thumb over her cheeks, swiping away any remainders of those tears.]

...But if you ever do need me, you don't need to ask. Use me however you want.

[He knows that this will take time. That he really, really has to build back up to her. And really, he, too, needs the time to wrestle with the pain she left him, to remove those shadows of doubts. Yet, maybe it's because of his age and experience he's better able to recognize the true root of their problem...

...And where to really focus all that bitter rage and hatred. She's stayed him for now, but he will never be able to promise he won't do what he should have done before.

But for now, he'll wait.]

[Except, she thinks, that is what she needs. A push. That firm hand—the same one that presses to her back that guided her to him now to continue to do the same. That is what she has always needed, when she was too afraid of what the change might bring her. Afraid that it would take away all the things that gave her meaning and a purpose. That would keep her head above water...

It had been what she wanted then too, only for her to watch him walk away, and for her to let him go. How he had slipped through her fingers because she was scared to tell him what she needed from him, and now fucking look at them.

Look at this mess that they have made of themselves.

He tells her to use him, tells her that he will wait, and for as much as she wants to scream no at him, she can't. The words tangle on her tongue, her voice seizes in her throat, and every desire, every need that Benedikta has is snuffed out and drowned in the darkness that continues to loom over her. As they ever have been.]

Enough. Don't say that.

[It only makes it harder for her. It only makes this hurt that much more.

But with that, his intense gaze and that press of his lips to her forehead become too much for her, and she'll finally shove them away from each other, forcing herself to let him go and for him to do the same.]

[At first he's about to let her pull back, the memory of that night in the cabin halting his desire to do otherwise.

But once again Jill's voice comes to mind:

Did you fight at all? Did you ask her once and believe that was it? It may not have been enough to break through the fear of wanting something so big, a change bigger than her, without a firm hand at her back.

A firm hand...

He'll allow her the space, let her step back. But then his hand snaps up to take hers, his eyes hardened with this resolve.

He doesn't know how firm he can be with her right now. Jill is likely right, but he has to do it right this time. If he goes too hard right now, it may still be too much. He can't do what he has done in the past and be so overbearing to get his way. He has to find some kind of middleground, a way to push while still giving her enough slack to breathe. That is going to be his challenge, and he'll be clumsy at first, but he has to goddamn try.]

I mean it.

[His voice is firm, and while he holds her hand, he doesn't pull her back. It's more of a staying force, a sign that he's not going to let her slip away completely so easily.]

If things get too much or overwhelming, just say the word. If you can't come to me, I'll go to you.

[He'll push like this as much as he can, until she can believe in him again. Trust in him. Until he can do the same with her.

And there is a bit of a hidden meaning in his words. He knows she will remain with Barnabas...and that irks him. A lot. But she seems to have other reasons for staying with him now, reasons she won't tell him. It's so similar to where they were back in Waleod, yet also so different. So perhaps this is also a test for him—a test of trusting her, believe in whatever the hell she's doing and that whatever this mess is between them, it's not completely empty. It's not fake. A ruse. And he has to prove to her that he'll be there to get her out when the time is right.]

[She had been ready to keep moving and to walk away from him—to where? She didn't know, but someplace far enough where that stare of his would no longer bear down so heavily upon her soul that she could not breathe...

But then he takes her hand and looks at her in such a way that her whole body might go alight in flames, that something in her chest nestling deeper, burrowing into her like strokes of lightning so often could. Hadn't she already told him that enough was enough? That she didn't want to hear it anymore? He had said it once, and it had hurt the first time.

All this is doing is making her heart twist and ache, confused over what it wants to do. How it wants to respond to such a bold promise.

How could she believe him so earnestly after everything? That doubt is there, prickling at the back of her mind, trying to remind her of it all. And even still, she doesn't pull her hand away, doesn't walk away from him like she had planned to, and instead, she meets his gaze. Not evenly, not with the same firmness and resolution that he carries in his, but with the conflict that he continues to arouse and disturb.

A conflict that has her fingers gently curling around his hand, only to tense and fall away from it again.]

And I mean it, too.

[Again he has to debate on whether he should try and push, especially when he sees that conflict and feels how her fingers curl against his before falling away. But this time, he decides that perhaps this is enough... For now. He doesn't want to break her down, and it is very early in this... Whatever this is that's happening between them.

So he lets her hand fall, his own handing in the air for a moment before it goes to his side.]

So long as you know.

[And that's really all he can say or do at this point. The rift between them remains, but... It does feel a little smaller. And for the first time in how many years, they managed to talk over the differences without it ending with them yelling at each other. Has to count for something right?

So he'll take the small win and start to turn to get his clothes and gather everything so he can work on the boat... When he stops dead in his tracks and slowly calls out her name.]

Uh.... Benedikta?

[His voice is strangely quiet, too.]

Looks like we have a little visitor.

[And should she look out to where he's staring, she'll find the young horned dolphin from earlier peeking out from beyond the surf, its little horn shimmering in the light.]

[She heard him. She knows. Now, it's only a matter of being able to wholly believe it. To have no fear of asking more than what she thinks she can handle or perhaps even more than she deserves, and to have no fear of the change that would come with it. Her whole life would turn upside-down, and she would have to let go of everything that she has made herself believe in after all these years—something that has been impossible and still feels like such a leap that not even she could make, wings or no.

Benedikta says nothing to follow, simply holding his gaze, as if to silently tell him that she does, and wherever she had been going before, she remains rooted firmly in place, her mind working too hard to tell her to move or even breathe as Cid gathers his clothes.

Not until he calls her name, that is, and she turns to glance over her shoulder—]

What?

[—to spot that glint of a horn poking out from the water. And she furrows her brow lightly.]

Come back for another go, has it?

[Oh boy—]

Careful, the parents are likely not so far behind.

[Instead he just holds up his Shellphone.]

Let's just try taking a picture first, eh? Won't go back emptyhanded at least.

[Well. There goes any semblance of calm that hung between them as Benedikta shoots him that ever-familiar glare.]

I wasn't going to do anything.

[Way to jump the gun, Cid!!! She learned her lesson, and that lesson is still stinging at the back of her shoulder.

But speaking of phones, she looks down to her own still tucked away in the pocket of the straps that hang off her, and then she looks at Cid, then back to the phone...

....]

I will let you handle it.

[Yeah. She still doesn't know how to take pictures.]

[Look. Even if she wasn't going to do anything, those parents may think differently if they make any sudden movements!!

But he'll glance at her.]

Still haven't figured it out?

[Wry grin as he swipes at the screen, taking a few steps back.]

It's easy, y'know. Can teach you now if you want. Also, mind stepping a little to the right a little?

[Just casually waving his hand.]

No.

[And as she steps to the right a little, as he asks, it's clear what that no is in response to, as she watches him with an arched brow, wondering what the hell he's asking her for. Was she in the way...???

Besides that, she doesn't want him to see that she still has that little duckling charm hanging off of hers. Especially when it hasn't escaped her notice that his is missing... and how it bothers her, frustratingly so.]

But you'll be splitting that reward with me.

Aye, of course.

[And he's just stepping a little to the side himself, lifting the phone just a little before there's the flash of the light. And another as he takes a few more—

And behind her, Benedikta will hear the excited trill and splash of the baby dolphin as he starts to move around.]

Little bugger keeps moving—but think I got a few.

[Without Benedikta, which are the only ones he'll show—]

ELTRUT: FAREWELL SENDOFF

ELAH: PALADIN BASE

NOGARD: CORSAIR BASE

MANTA BOARD

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