Who: Cidolfus Telamon & Benedikta Harman. Status: Closed. Where: The Roost, The Farplane. What: Cid and Benedikta move to a new house in the Roost. Event stuff later. Warnings: The usual. :)
[Another wind ripples through in retaliation to his attack, though it does not do much besides dissolving the cold and sending it back his way.]
What the hell is—shit—
[She curses at herself when she feels the nip of something sharp on her skin again, more of the ice and lightning tearing through her leathers, the cuts on her arms so paper thin that they burn. But more than that, she curses at herself for still not being able to do anything. For still faltering when she knows that he would rather she did not.]
Fucking hell, come on!
[It's a cry at herself, tears lining her eyes again as she stares across at the man who is hers but not, her heart still at odds with itself. But if she needs to knock this soul around in there a little bit, then... so be it...
With a scream, her aether gathers around her, and she sends them forward, blades of wind crossing the space between them, the light nearly blinding as it surrounds her and shoots outward.
Only for them to grind to a halt inches from reaching him, the magic hovering in the air. She stands there, her knees nearly buckling under her, heaving for breaths, her face twisting with this conflict.]
[The force behind that attack actually made him question and try to block it. But when he sees those blades halt, the swirl of green faltering right in front of him, another laugh barks out.]
Aaaahh, it's always like this. Even when you know you could save him, you can't for fear of hurting him.
[With a swing of his arm, a wave of ice cuts through the winds and races at her, but what will knock her back won't be the ice but himself, appearing with a crack of ice and thunder as he slams his boot into her chest to send her falling back before it presses against her sternum.]
[She coughs at the impact, every bit of air that she'd managed to take in leaving her all at once the moment his boot crashes into her chest. It all happens too quickly even for her reflexes, and she is sent onto her back, crushed under the weight of his foot. She barely even has the strength to shove him off as she tries to catch her breath.
Her vision starts to fog, and in those moments, she sees the images of the man she loves and her king blurring together. How he might have crushed her just like this when she returned empty-handed... Acted like she owed him for his mercy before he threw her to the dogs. But then there is Cid, hidden beneath the coldness of this thing that's taken over his body...
Her magic comes to life again, but it had already been significantly weakened before her hesitation, and she exhales with a sob...
[He continues to see her struggle, even as he leans forward, arm resting languidly against his knee.]
Are you truly so weak for a man? But which one...the one you love? Or the one you fear?
[He laughs, eyes now a dark, cold blue before the boot lifts only for it to be replaced by his knees as he drops down, a hand at her neck to strangle her.]
Oh, Benna Benna Benna. You had it all, trying to be the queen bee, and yet all you have in the end is nothing to show for it. Really, why this man chased after is a mystery.
[His gaze is cast to the side, distant, before he smirks and looks back down at her, his voice and mannerisms taking on a more effeminate tone.]
Perhaps I should have tried taking your body instead, show him a woman worth fighting for...but he's too smart for that. Shame.
[He leans down closer, the grip tightening.]
Well, I get to have fun with him in my own way...even right now.
[Every word strikes at those insecurities that she keeps buried as far down as possible, her confidence and hauteur nothing more than a mask. She knows that. She always has, but it does not make it sting any less when they are poked and prodded at by someone who should know nothing about them. It hurts all the more now after Ultima had truly cracked her open and laid them all out for her to see. She wishes that she could be stronger than them, but there are times when they rear their ugly head.
Times like now when it matters.
When she cannot seem to save him...
Her eyes, blurry with tears, snap open at the change in the voice. No longer is it just an echo of Cid's or Barnabas's, but... there is something else there as well that she was not quite expecting to hear come from him. It's more... feminine? And she tries to speak, tries to scream, but nothing comes out besides a sob at first as her hand clutches around his wrist, nails digging into the skin there.]
[There's just a cold smirk as those fingers squeeze tighter.]
Goodbye, Benedikta.
[A cold frost forms at his fingertips, biting into her skin as it starts to creep up while she will feel her aether and energy once again slowly being drawn away. The electric sparks that soon follow are not warm or hot, but also ice cold, no traces of that familiar warmth left. Tighter the hand squeezes, further the ice crawls, until—]
Augh!
[A strangled cry erupts from Cid as the ice shatters and he jerks back away from her, lightning ripping up the arm in that brilliant purple and blue.]
Impossible—! I had you, you should be dead!
[The voice screams out, a strange voice. It's not longer just Cid's, but there is another voice mixed and echoing with it, as if two voices at once. As a hand clutches his head, the aether in the air fluctuates before Benedikta will hear a clear voice shout at her.]
[The wind roars, howling as it passes over the cliffs, picking up the debris and moss and static. It stretches up and around, growing more violent as those fingers around her throat tighten, as if her magic is responding without her command, Garuda coming to her defense when she otherwise could not. She can hear the laughter, the malicious cackling, the taunting and mocking in the sounds of the wind, and as she closes her eyes to the feel of it whipping against her face, she feels her tears burn against her cheeks. Burning alongside the cold ice that creeps along her skin.]
I'm...
[Her voice and the words die in her throat when she hears that strangled cry, and she is freed from the hand around her throat. She heaves in a giant breath, struggling and coughing to get the air back into her lungs as she sits up, watching as he fumbles backwards in disbelief.]
... Cidolfus?
[Her heart thumps against her ribs when she feels that shift in the aether, the warmth that ripples through her wind so familiar that it draws her to her feet.
Everything freezes when he says that, and she knows... She knows that it's him. There's a moment when she lifts a hand, and the wind changes direction, shifting into her control again, but...]
Cidolfus, I... I cannot...
[She falters upon seeing him struggle. Again. And she sees it: a flicker of the images that Ultima had shown her, with Garuda's claws—her claws driven through him time and time again.]
[There's another shout, another scream as the voices mix together again.]
Damn old man—! I won't let you!
[Whose voice is saying what is hard to discern, but it's clear that the two souls are wrestling for control until there's a sharp rise in heat, a spike in the aether as a giant, powerful bolt of lightning suddenly descends from the skies and strikes Cid head on. It goes on and on, lasting for what feels like forever before it finally starts to dissipate. Any other person or soul would have been decimated by such a attack, one that she should be most familiar—Judgment Bolt. An attack usually only executed by Ramuh himself.
Yet, although now looking like a bloody mess, Cid somehow remains standing. He coughs, hand gripping his shoulder as he looks at her. His eyes clear and green, but his expression is strained, as if still waging that war.]
I can't get rid of this thing on my own. Even now it's—
[He bites his lower lip with a groan as he staggers, hand going to his mouth as he coughs and tastes that hint of metal on his tongue.]
[She panics when that heat reaches her and the rise in aether prickles her skin. It is familiar, but what's more is that it's far too much, even she knows that. Too much for just the Dominant to take, but it strikes anyway. She has to shield herself from the blast, the light all too blinding, and were she anyone else, the static might have burned right through her.
When her vision finally corrects itself, she sees him standing in the middle of the carnage, all of the moss and rocks and corals burned to nothing more than black soot. Rushing forward, Benedikta catches him as he staggers, tears already streaking down her cheeks when she sees the blood he's covered in as well as the trickle of it down his lip.
She can see him struggle, even as his eyes have returned to the green she is so familiar with and loves far too much. And perhaps that is why even now, she is conflicted herself, especially seeing him like this, the bloody mess that he is. It all reminds her too much of that day, and of what she saw when they had gone up against Ultima. How he had been covered in his blood because of her...
And how she had vowed to herself that she would never hurt him again.
Her hands shake as they grip him, and he'll feel the small amount of aether that she has left bleeding into the air, the wind starting to whip around them again, but...]
I—I can't... I cannot hurt you again... Look at yourself!
[Another cough as he fights for the strength to steady himself, the struggle of staying aware while keeping the spirit at bay clear as he leans against her. But even so, he gives her a determined grin.]
You won't.
[Although his voice is rough, there's a steadiness there, filled with the sincere belief in his words.]
Whatever you do, I'll be able to handle it. I'm still standing now, aren't I?
[A rough laugh before he has to take a shaky breath. Less convincing, sure, but he pushes along with it, anyway.]
Just trust me...just as I trust you.
[His hand finds hers then, and she'll feel that trickling warmth of levin gracing her skin.]
[Her voice breaks when she feels that lightning—his lightning—dance over her skin, the difference from the icy lightning that had nicked her skin earlier so stark.
He puts far too much faith and trust in her. She is nothing if not weak these days, every one of her insecurities and traumas picked at and pulled apart by those who have no right to even see them. How this soul had known all of those things, she does not know, but it had known where to hit her where it hurt most.]
You are already hurt... Surely there must be another way...!?
[She tries to catch him but she only stumbles back a step instead, as if touching him will be the thing that makes him break. She watches him struggle, not quite sure what to do, still that conflict waging in her heart. It's a terrifying thing, hurting the person that you love, and she has done it far too many times than she would like to admit. Again, she sees him on the ground, barely hanging on to life, covered in blood and sand and rain. She sees her claws piercing him every time she blinks her eyes shut, the talons dragging along his skin.
Just a bit of wind, she tells herself. It's just a bit of wind... but even that feels too much, as her aether grows and swells, the winds churning with a new violence that is nearly out of her control. In them, she hears Garuda's laughter again, as if she were the roaring of it herself.
But the longer she watches him struggle against this ghost, the harder it becomes for her to control. It's cold, sharp as it bites against her cheeks, and it quivers against what little hold she does have on it.]
I'm...I'm sorry...
[A hold that she sets free with a distressed cry, not knowing what will happen to it when she does.
But it pours in every uncertainty, every insecurity, every fear that she has and sends it outward in a powerful gale. It's enough to even force her to dig her heels into the ground to stop herself from being knocked back, and certainly enough to knock him and the ghost away. The aether bleeds into his, and he'll feel hers press against his skin, like it means to push the soul out of him on its own.
This is to save him, she reminds herself. He trusts her, and she will not hurt him...]
Get... out...!
[With one last push, a powerful ripple of wind cuts through the space before it completely dissipates, leaving them in a mess of debris, and her bracing herself on her knees to stop herself from collapsing, her body trembling like a leaf, almost completely out of breath and in tears.]
[Just as he's about to lose consciousness again, he feels her winds, feels it pushing against him and the ghost latched inside of him. In truth he had considerably damaged it, but it was a powerful soul, perhaps one that had existed for centuries to be this powerful. It certainly knew what it was doing and what it wanted to do.
Thus Cid lets everything go, falling back to the ground as the sounds of a ghastly wail and ear piercing screams can be heard in the winds.
"NO NO NO!" the ghost shrieks as its shadow can be seen slowly emerging from Cid's body. "So close...I WAS SO CLOSE!"
Although distorted by the malevolent corruption, the figure is a long-haired woman, nails digging into Cid's neck as its torso is pushed out further until most of the body is revealed.
"YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! IT SHOULD BE ME! ME!!"]
[She stares at him on the ground through the horror in her eyes, and she is about to call out to him, to rush to him, but what happens next roots her feet to the ground, stilling her. It's hard to tell as the wind picks up again in response where Garuda's screams in her head end and the ghoul's begin, but they are ghastly. Something so inhuman that it makes her skin crawl as the figure tries to claw her way back into Cid's body, the other part of her being drawn out—or perhaps pushed out—by their aether.
She shrieks, and Benedikta watches, her own face twisting with her growing rage. With a snarl under her breath, she storms through the walls of wind, crossing the distance between them. She does not know what she will do or how she will stop this, but her body is moving all on its own, her exhaustion be damned. She has had quite enough of this, and although it is difficult to breathe and every bone and muscle in her aches, she makes it there quickly. Quick enough that, distorted as it is, she can see the surprise on the ghost's face when she stops within arms reach.
They stare at one another for a moment, the wind howling in her ears, before she reaches out and grabs the ghost by the hair, twisting it around a fist and pulling as hard as she can—]
I said... get out!
[—and she yanks the shrieking woman to the ground, slamming her head against it. She flips her over and presses her boot to the woman's sternum, crushing it until she is the one struggling for air. She watches her for a moment, frowning through her tears and gritting teeth.]
Pathetic.
["Stop... STOP... STOOOO—"
There's a loud snapping sound beneath her scream as Benedikta pulls on the hair again, and her boot slams against her neck, and it's followed by an even louder CRACK before everything goes silent. Can this kill a soul? Is she dead? Well, just to be sure...]
And stay down.
[She pushes out one last storm, those same wind blades forming around her before they duplicate, again and again. In a single motion, they rain down over the body, cutting into her in a thousand different places until, with one last horrific scream, she dissolves into nothing.
Only for Benedikta to fall to her knees at Cid's side once she's sure that she is gone, nearly collapsing herself.]
[Throughout it all, Cid doesn't stir at all, and even once Benedikta has finished destroy that godforsaken soul, his body remains still, skin pale—paler than it already was in this form. The only signs of "life" is the very subtle rise and fall of his chest.]
[She shifts him as carefully as she can so that he is resting on her lap, cradled in her arms as she tries to get a good look at him, blinking away the tears and trying to clear her vision.]
Cidolfus?
[The slow and subtle movement of his chest is not enough to stem the flow of panic that surges throughout her, making her hands tremble like mad as she touches him. Caresses his face, tries to shake him awake with a tight grip on his jacket.]
Cidolfus...
[His blood covers her fingers and she is back on that beach—their beach—as he lay almost lifeless in her arms. And all because of her...]
Wake up.
[A warmth washes over them both, though it is brief, as she attempts to heal him, but she's used up everything that she had on that final burst of magic to push out the ghost. It fades just as quickly as she had been able to conjure it.]
[Even as she moves him, he doesn't stir. Only the strands of his hair shift with the movement of the wind before they once again fall still, little to no change visible in his complexion.]
[She tries again and fails. And again. And again... each time her winds that brush over him becoming weaker. Each time it breaks her a little further into more violent sobs.]
I cannot carry you back like this... so fucking wake up.
[She shakes him, presses her hands to his face, clutches him, does whatever she can to try and get a little bit of life jolted back into him, but nothing that she does seems to work.
Perhaps Ultima was right.
Perhaps she truly does break everything that she touches, all of it slipping through her fingers like desert sand sweeps in the wind. She cannot love because all she ever does is destroy, just like the wind does to everything it touches over time. She had been afraid to hurt him, and even in saving him, did she truly save him? As she looks down at him now, barely breathing, she thinks not. She was afraid, and she still hurt him. Every single time... It's always her claws that dig into him. And she cannot even tell how badly she had because she is now too terrified to move him, lest it worsen his wounds any further.
What is she supposed to do now? With her own body weakened, barely able to hold him up on her lap, she cannot take him all the way back, and there is not a soul to be seen anywhere. Not even the guardians have come to help. She cannot do this on her own, and the one person who she could lean on in moments like this is lying nearly dead in her arms, covered in his own blood, and now hers.]
Cidolfus, I cannot do this...! Wake up.
[She pleads with him, lowering her head until it rests against his, her body no longer able to hold itself up.
And she does not just mean carrying him back or figuring out what to do.
Those words carry a weight to them that she cannot shoulder on her own. Her mind is a tangled mess, her wayward thoughts racing to all sorts of horrible outcomes, the panic in her like a rising tide that has come to sweep her away and drown her. How is she supposed to keep her head up above ground if the one person who can pull her out of its depths is not there to reach his hand out for her to take!?
She breaks with a sob, everything shattering around her at the thought of it and the realization that if she cannot get him out of here quickly, it will only become worse. A fear grips her—if they do not get back and out of this place before it's too late, will they be stuck here forever? Will their souls be locked in the Farplane?
She tries to push herself to her feet and bring him with her, but she collapses on top of him with another violent sob—one that shakes through her whole body and ends in her fingers as they grip him mercilessly.]
What am I supposed to do? I cannot... I cannot do this...
[She can barely even stand at this rate or speak. Or breathe. Every last bit of her strength gone with his shallow breaths.]
We cannot stay here, do you hear me!?
[Yet she tries to do all of those things anyway, failing when her breaths leave her in uneven sobs.]
We have to leave... We have to go home... Our home...
[Another push of her aether outward, but she doesn't even feel it this time, and she grits her teeth so hard and bites back a swear she fears they might shatter.]
There is so much left for us to do... and we have only barely started...
[They have only just begun their lives together in their new home, and she cannot imagine returning to it without him.]
You owe me all those stupid dates, and I owe you those cakes... Those stupid fucking cakes that you love so much. I don't know why—
[She pounds her fist against his shoulder, ignoring the pain that shoots up her arm. Magic trickles out, but it does nothing. Her eyes desperately search around for someone to call out for help to, but she is only met with emptiness and an eerie silence that rings in her ears.]
And... [She sobs again, harder this time, her forehead pressed firmly to the side of his face before she yells at him through her tears.] We promised each other that we would one day...
[Her words and her voice falter.]
A family, Cidolfus... We promised. [She swallows into another violent sob, her heart twisting at the memories that rush through her thoughts.] You've yet to propose to me again, you foolish old man, so that I can say yes...!
[The sound of his voice at all startles her from her sobs, and she lifts her head with a gasp to stare down at him in disbelief, waiting with bated breath for him to finish, frozen on the spot like the tiniest little movement will break this illusion.
She is only sure that it is not because he says that.
Her heart squeezes, and there are several heartbeats where he is also met with silence...]
You...!
[And then her hand slaps weakly against his chest, tears welling in her eyes. She hits him once more, and then a third time for good luck before she leans over and captures his lips in a fierce kiss with little regard for either of them in pain. He'll feel the wetness of her tears on his cheeks, and the quiver of her lips over his, her whole body trembling from this tide of relief.]
You awaken and that is the first thing—you stupid old man!
[At first it's a weak laugh and then a slight grimace since although her hits were weak he was still feeling quite tender. All of which is taken away by that kiss, one that he returns in kind as his first initial response. A kiss that also holds regret and guilt for putting her through this yet again.
Slowly a hand reaches up to thread through her hair, cradling the back of her head as he continues the kiss, moving from her lips to her cheek to the tops of her eyes, tasting those tears. How many times has he done this to her, really? How many times has he brought her to tears, crushing her with the anguish and torment of fear of losing him.
And even though this time wasn't even his fault, he wasn't able to take care of it on his own. He had struggled, far more than he expected, to the point that the words from Ultima had started to haunt and weaken him before he was finally able to gather the strength needed. Yet even then it was not enough.
How is he supposed to help her, protect her, save her if he can't even save himself...?]
I'm sorry.
[The words come out in a hoarse whisper as his lips brush over her lashes with a sigh.]
[It's a weak murmur as she closes her eyes, allowing his lips to brush over them, to kiss away every ache and every hurt that she feels, if only for the time that this lasts. She wraps herself up in his arms, her own sliding around his shoulders as she rests over him, not caring where they are or that they are lying in the middle of all this debris and dust. She is just grateful that he is alive and awake...
Fingers clutching his jacket, she pulls him closer, her face burying into his neck where she sobs quietly.]
Making me worry like that!
[Making her fear for his life, and all at her hand, too. It was neither of their faults and she knows this, but that does not take away the guilt that she feels regardless for not finding a better way to overcome it.]
[Another low voice filled with that guilt and regret as he just hugs her closer with what he strength he has. Yet through all this, there is something he needs to make sure is said, that is made clear to her.]
But you did it, love.
[His hand gently strokes the back of her hair as a faint smile can be felt.]
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no subject
Maybe you're right, or maybe not. You'll find out soon enough!
[Now with an eerie laugh, he flings another spell, a mix of that ice and lightning that spreads a chill throughout the area.]
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What the hell is—shit—
[She curses at herself when she feels the nip of something sharp on her skin again, more of the ice and lightning tearing through her leathers, the cuts on her arms so paper thin that they burn. But more than that, she curses at herself for still not being able to do anything. For still faltering when she knows that he would rather she did not.]
Fucking hell, come on!
[It's a cry at herself, tears lining her eyes again as she stares across at the man who is hers but not, her heart still at odds with itself. But if she needs to knock this soul around in there a little bit, then... so be it...
With a scream, her aether gathers around her, and she sends them forward, blades of wind crossing the space between them, the light nearly blinding as it surrounds her and shoots outward.
Only for them to grind to a halt inches from reaching him, the magic hovering in the air. She stands there, her knees nearly buckling under her, heaving for breaths, her face twisting with this conflict.]
no subject
Aaaahh, it's always like this. Even when you know you could save him, you can't for fear of hurting him.
[With a swing of his arm, a wave of ice cuts through the winds and races at her, but what will knock her back won't be the ice but himself, appearing with a crack of ice and thunder as he slams his boot into her chest to send her falling back before it presses against her sternum.]
Pathetic.
no subject
Her vision starts to fog, and in those moments, she sees the images of the man she loves and her king blurring together. How he might have crushed her just like this when she returned empty-handed... Acted like she owed him for his mercy before he threw her to the dogs. But then there is Cid, hidden beneath the coldness of this thing that's taken over his body...
Her magic comes to life again, but it had already been significantly weakened before her hesitation, and she exhales with a sob...
Why the fuck can't she do it!?]
no subject
Are you truly so weak for a man? But which one...the one you love? Or the one you fear?
[He laughs, eyes now a dark, cold blue before the boot lifts only for it to be replaced by his knees as he drops down, a hand at her neck to strangle her.]
Oh, Benna Benna Benna. You had it all, trying to be the queen bee, and yet all you have in the end is nothing to show for it. Really, why this man chased after is a mystery.
[His gaze is cast to the side, distant, before he smirks and looks back down at her, his voice and mannerisms taking on a more effeminate tone.]
Perhaps I should have tried taking your body instead, show him a woman worth fighting for...but he's too smart for that. Shame.
[He leans down closer, the grip tightening.]
Well, I get to have fun with him in my own way...even right now.
no subject
Times like now when it matters.
When she cannot seem to save him...
Her eyes, blurry with tears, snap open at the change in the voice. No longer is it just an echo of Cid's or Barnabas's, but... there is something else there as well that she was not quite expecting to hear come from him. It's more... feminine? And she tries to speak, tries to scream, but nothing comes out besides a sob at first as her hand clutches around his wrist, nails digging into the skin there.]
...You are wrong...
[And she wishes that she believed that.]
no subject
Goodbye, Benedikta.
[A cold frost forms at his fingertips, biting into her skin as it starts to creep up while she will feel her aether and energy once again slowly being drawn away. The electric sparks that soon follow are not warm or hot, but also ice cold, no traces of that familiar warmth left. Tighter the hand squeezes, further the ice crawls, until—]
Augh!
[A strangled cry erupts from Cid as the ice shatters and he jerks back away from her, lightning ripping up the arm in that brilliant purple and blue.]
Impossible—! I had you, you should be dead!
[The voice screams out, a strange voice. It's not longer just Cid's, but there is another voice mixed and echoing with it, as if two voices at once. As a hand clutches his head, the aether in the air fluctuates before Benedikta will hear a clear voice shout at her.]
For fuck's sake, Benedikta, hit me!
no subject
I'm...
[Her voice and the words die in her throat when she hears that strangled cry, and she is freed from the hand around her throat. She heaves in a giant breath, struggling and coughing to get the air back into her lungs as she sits up, watching as he fumbles backwards in disbelief.]
... Cidolfus?
[Her heart thumps against her ribs when she feels that shift in the aether, the warmth that ripples through her wind so familiar that it draws her to her feet.
Everything freezes when he says that, and she knows... She knows that it's him. There's a moment when she lifts a hand, and the wind changes direction, shifting into her control again, but...]
Cidolfus, I... I cannot...
[She falters upon seeing him struggle. Again. And she sees it: a flicker of the images that Ultima had shown her, with Garuda's claws—her claws driven through him time and time again.]
no subject
[There's another shout, another scream as the voices mix together again.]
Damn old man—! I won't let you!
[Whose voice is saying what is hard to discern, but it's clear that the two souls are wrestling for control until there's a sharp rise in heat, a spike in the aether as a giant, powerful bolt of lightning suddenly descends from the skies and strikes Cid head on. It goes on and on, lasting for what feels like forever before it finally starts to dissipate. Any other person or soul would have been decimated by such a attack, one that she should be most familiar—Judgment Bolt. An attack usually only executed by Ramuh himself.
Yet, although now looking like a bloody mess, Cid somehow remains standing. He coughs, hand gripping his shoulder as he looks at her. His eyes clear and green, but his expression is strained, as if still waging that war.]
I can't get rid of this thing on my own. Even now it's—
[He bites his lower lip with a groan as he staggers, hand going to his mouth as he coughs and tastes that hint of metal on his tongue.]
no subject
[She panics when that heat reaches her and the rise in aether prickles her skin. It is familiar, but what's more is that it's far too much, even she knows that. Too much for just the Dominant to take, but it strikes anyway. She has to shield herself from the blast, the light all too blinding, and were she anyone else, the static might have burned right through her.
When her vision finally corrects itself, she sees him standing in the middle of the carnage, all of the moss and rocks and corals burned to nothing more than black soot. Rushing forward, Benedikta catches him as he staggers, tears already streaking down her cheeks when she sees the blood he's covered in as well as the trickle of it down his lip.
She can see him struggle, even as his eyes have returned to the green she is so familiar with and loves far too much. And perhaps that is why even now, she is conflicted herself, especially seeing him like this, the bloody mess that he is. It all reminds her too much of that day, and of what she saw when they had gone up against Ultima. How he had been covered in his blood because of her...
And how she had vowed to herself that she would never hurt him again.
Her hands shake as they grip him, and he'll feel the small amount of aether that she has left bleeding into the air, the wind starting to whip around them again, but...]
I—I can't... I cannot hurt you again... Look at yourself!
no subject
You won't.
[Although his voice is rough, there's a steadiness there, filled with the sincere belief in his words.]
Whatever you do, I'll be able to handle it. I'm still standing now, aren't I?
[A rough laugh before he has to take a shaky breath. Less convincing, sure, but he pushes along with it, anyway.]
Just trust me...just as I trust you.
[His hand finds hers then, and she'll feel that trickling warmth of levin gracing her skin.]
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[Her voice breaks when she feels that lightning—his lightning—dance over her skin, the difference from the icy lightning that had nicked her skin earlier so stark.
He puts far too much faith and trust in her. She is nothing if not weak these days, every one of her insecurities and traumas picked at and pulled apart by those who have no right to even see them. How this soul had known all of those things, she does not know, but it had known where to hit her where it hurt most.]
You are already hurt... Surely there must be another way...!?
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You saw it just now, didn't you? Even with Ramuh's help it's still in me—
[A strangled cry as his body slumps forward and he gasps for air.]
I'm at...my limit, Benna—!
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[She tries to catch him but she only stumbles back a step instead, as if touching him will be the thing that makes him break. She watches him struggle, not quite sure what to do, still that conflict waging in her heart. It's a terrifying thing, hurting the person that you love, and she has done it far too many times than she would like to admit. Again, she sees him on the ground, barely hanging on to life, covered in blood and sand and rain. She sees her claws piercing him every time she blinks her eyes shut, the talons dragging along his skin.
Just a bit of wind, she tells herself. It's just a bit of wind... but even that feels too much, as her aether grows and swells, the winds churning with a new violence that is nearly out of her control. In them, she hears Garuda's laughter again, as if she were the roaring of it herself.
But the longer she watches him struggle against this ghost, the harder it becomes for her to control. It's cold, sharp as it bites against her cheeks, and it quivers against what little hold she does have on it.]
I'm...I'm sorry...
[A hold that she sets free with a distressed cry, not knowing what will happen to it when she does.
But it pours in every uncertainty, every insecurity, every fear that she has and sends it outward in a powerful gale. It's enough to even force her to dig her heels into the ground to stop herself from being knocked back, and certainly enough to knock him and the ghost away. The aether bleeds into his, and he'll feel hers press against his skin, like it means to push the soul out of him on its own.
This is to save him, she reminds herself. He trusts her, and she will not hurt him...]
Get... out...!
[With one last push, a powerful ripple of wind cuts through the space before it completely dissipates, leaving them in a mess of debris, and her bracing herself on her knees to stop herself from collapsing, her body trembling like a leaf, almost completely out of breath and in tears.]
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Thus Cid lets everything go, falling back to the ground as the sounds of a ghastly wail and ear piercing screams can be heard in the winds.
"NO NO NO!" the ghost shrieks as its shadow can be seen slowly emerging from Cid's body. "So close...I WAS SO CLOSE!"
Although distorted by the malevolent corruption, the figure is a long-haired woman, nails digging into Cid's neck as its torso is pushed out further until most of the body is revealed.
"YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! IT SHOULD BE ME! ME!!"]
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She shrieks, and Benedikta watches, her own face twisting with her growing rage. With a snarl under her breath, she storms through the walls of wind, crossing the distance between them. She does not know what she will do or how she will stop this, but her body is moving all on its own, her exhaustion be damned. She has had quite enough of this, and although it is difficult to breathe and every bone and muscle in her aches, she makes it there quickly. Quick enough that, distorted as it is, she can see the surprise on the ghost's face when she stops within arms reach.
They stare at one another for a moment, the wind howling in her ears, before she reaches out and grabs the ghost by the hair, twisting it around a fist and pulling as hard as she can—]
I said... get out!
[—and she yanks the shrieking woman to the ground, slamming her head against it. She flips her over and presses her boot to the woman's sternum, crushing it until she is the one struggling for air. She watches her for a moment, frowning through her tears and gritting teeth.]
Pathetic.
["Stop... STOP... STOOOO—"
There's a loud snapping sound beneath her scream as Benedikta pulls on the hair again, and her boot slams against her neck, and it's followed by an even louder CRACK before everything goes silent. Can this kill a soul? Is she dead? Well, just to be sure...]
And stay down.
[She pushes out one last storm, those same wind blades forming around her before they duplicate, again and again. In a single motion, they rain down over the body, cutting into her in a thousand different places until, with one last horrific scream, she dissolves into nothing.
Only for Benedikta to fall to her knees at Cid's side once she's sure that she is gone, nearly collapsing herself.]
Cidolfus...!?
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Cidolfus?
[The slow and subtle movement of his chest is not enough to stem the flow of panic that surges throughout her, making her hands tremble like mad as she touches him. Caresses his face, tries to shake him awake with a tight grip on his jacket.]
Cidolfus...
[His blood covers her fingers and she is back on that beach—their beach—as he lay almost lifeless in her arms. And all because of her...]
Wake up.
[A warmth washes over them both, though it is brief, as she attempts to heal him, but she's used up everything that she had on that final burst of magic to push out the ghost. It fades just as quickly as she had been able to conjure it.]
Wake up, damn it...
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I cannot carry you back like this... so fucking wake up.
[She shakes him, presses her hands to his face, clutches him, does whatever she can to try and get a little bit of life jolted back into him, but nothing that she does seems to work.
Perhaps Ultima was right.
Perhaps she truly does break everything that she touches, all of it slipping through her fingers like desert sand sweeps in the wind. She cannot love because all she ever does is destroy, just like the wind does to everything it touches over time. She had been afraid to hurt him, and even in saving him, did she truly save him? As she looks down at him now, barely breathing, she thinks not. She was afraid, and she still hurt him. Every single time... It's always her claws that dig into him. And she cannot even tell how badly she had because she is now too terrified to move him, lest it worsen his wounds any further.
What is she supposed to do now? With her own body weakened, barely able to hold him up on her lap, she cannot take him all the way back, and there is not a soul to be seen anywhere. Not even the guardians have come to help. She cannot do this on her own, and the one person who she could lean on in moments like this is lying nearly dead in her arms, covered in his own blood, and now hers.]
Cidolfus, I cannot do this...! Wake up.
[She pleads with him, lowering her head until it rests against his, her body no longer able to hold itself up.
And she does not just mean carrying him back or figuring out what to do.
Those words carry a weight to them that she cannot shoulder on her own. Her mind is a tangled mess, her wayward thoughts racing to all sorts of horrible outcomes, the panic in her like a rising tide that has come to sweep her away and drown her. How is she supposed to keep her head up above ground if the one person who can pull her out of its depths is not there to reach his hand out for her to take!?
She breaks with a sob, everything shattering around her at the thought of it and the realization that if she cannot get him out of here quickly, it will only become worse. A fear grips her—if they do not get back and out of this place before it's too late, will they be stuck here forever? Will their souls be locked in the Farplane?
She tries to push herself to her feet and bring him with her, but she collapses on top of him with another violent sob—one that shakes through her whole body and ends in her fingers as they grip him mercilessly.]
What am I supposed to do? I cannot... I cannot do this...
[She can barely even stand at this rate or speak. Or breathe. Every last bit of her strength gone with his shallow breaths.]
We cannot stay here, do you hear me!?
[Yet she tries to do all of those things anyway, failing when her breaths leave her in uneven sobs.]
We have to leave... We have to go home... Our home...
[Another push of her aether outward, but she doesn't even feel it this time, and she grits her teeth so hard and bites back a swear she fears they might shatter.]
There is so much left for us to do... and we have only barely started...
[They have only just begun their lives together in their new home, and she cannot imagine returning to it without him.]
You owe me all those stupid dates, and I owe you those cakes... Those stupid fucking cakes that you love so much. I don't know why—
[She pounds her fist against his shoulder, ignoring the pain that shoots up her arm. Magic trickles out, but it does nothing. Her eyes desperately search around for someone to call out for help to, but she is only met with emptiness and an eerie silence that rings in her ears.]
And... [She sobs again, harder this time, her forehead pressed firmly to the side of his face before she yells at him through her tears.] We promised each other that we would one day...
[Her words and her voice falter.]
A family, Cidolfus... We promised. [She swallows into another violent sob, her heart twisting at the memories that rush through her thoughts.] You've yet to propose to me again, you foolish old man, so that I can say yes...!
...
So get up!
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Silence—]
So—
[—that is broken with a rough, worn voice, heavy with fatigue yet somehow still brimming with a playful lilt.]
Will you marry me now?
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She is only sure that it is not because he says that.
Her heart squeezes, and there are several heartbeats where he is also met with silence...]
You...!
[And then her hand slaps weakly against his chest, tears welling in her eyes. She hits him once more, and then a third time for good luck before she leans over and captures his lips in a fierce kiss with little regard for either of them in pain. He'll feel the wetness of her tears on his cheeks, and the quiver of her lips over his, her whole body trembling from this tide of relief.]
You awaken and that is the first thing—you stupid old man!
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Slowly a hand reaches up to thread through her hair, cradling the back of her head as he continues the kiss, moving from her lips to her cheek to the tops of her eyes, tasting those tears. How many times has he done this to her, really? How many times has he brought her to tears, crushing her with the anguish and torment of fear of losing him.
And even though this time wasn't even his fault, he wasn't able to take care of it on his own. He had struggled, far more than he expected, to the point that the words from Ultima had started to haunt and weaken him before he was finally able to gather the strength needed. Yet even then it was not enough.
How is he supposed to help her, protect her, save her if he can't even save himself...?]
I'm sorry.
[The words come out in a hoarse whisper as his lips brush over her lashes with a sigh.]
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[It's a weak murmur as she closes her eyes, allowing his lips to brush over them, to kiss away every ache and every hurt that she feels, if only for the time that this lasts. She wraps herself up in his arms, her own sliding around his shoulders as she rests over him, not caring where they are or that they are lying in the middle of all this debris and dust. She is just grateful that he is alive and awake...
Fingers clutching his jacket, she pulls him closer, her face burying into his neck where she sobs quietly.]
Making me worry like that!
[Making her fear for his life, and all at her hand, too. It was neither of their faults and she knows this, but that does not take away the guilt that she feels regardless for not finding a better way to overcome it.]
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[Another low voice filled with that guilt and regret as he just hugs her closer with what he strength he has. Yet through all this, there is something he needs to make sure is said, that is made clear to her.]
But you did it, love.
[His hand gently strokes the back of her hair as a faint smile can be felt.]
Without you I would be gone for good.
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✨ timeskip ✨
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💚💜 fin.